10 year crush! Please help!!!!

Hi everyone, I've never participated in one of these types of sites before and I am not really too sure how it works so please bear with me. Well, I guess the best place to start is always the beginning so.....here goes! In January of 2004 I met a guy that worked two doors down from the shop I was at and I had an instant crush on him. He would come over every now and then on his lunch break to get something to eat and chat with me. Around April or May of that same year I picked up a second job at the same place he worked. He actually ended up being my manager. During the few months I was there he always scheduled us to work together when it was his turn to make the schedule and we would play around at work too. After a few months of working with him he moved to a city a little further away and transferred out there. We eventually lost contact until May of 2010 when we reconnected online we currently live 3000+ miles from each other. It was like we had never lost touch, but this time was different. This time true feelings came out. He told me he had had a crush on me since the day we met and had thought about me often throughout the years and I told him I felt the same way. Up until May of last year we would text everyday and talk on the phone when ever we could (just to kind of show how far our texts went, there was A LOT of sexting).... then I flew out to see him for a few days. We had a great time and he even stayed together in my hotel room. We didn't end up having sex, but we got really close. Everything was normal for a couple months after I flew back home and then he just suddenly stopped texting or calling me. When he would text me he always said he had been busy with something. We do still talk, but it's like a once or twice a month type thing. We have talked about why we can't be an item even though we have the same feelings for each other and he says he doesn't want to be in a long distance relationship. If I could move back to my home state I would do it in a heart beat, but unfortunately moving that far is quite expensive. I don't know what to do. I've been trying to keep myself busy so I don't think about him, but no matter what I'm doing something makes me think of him. It could be a song on the radio in the car or at work, a movie commercial, a customers body spray, anything. I've had a hard core, whole hearted, head over heals crush on this guy for nearly 10 years now and no matter what I do I can not stop thinking about him. Its too the point where I will not date anyone else. I have tried going on a couple dates, but end up breaking it off after the first or second date because he is all I can think about and I don't think its fair to the guy who I'm on the date with. What can I do to get over him. Its driving me bananas! I don't text him every day, call him up 50 times in 30 minutes, or stalk him online. Any advice would be greatly appreciated please. I need to learn how to deal with the fact that we will never be together no matter how much I want us to be.

Haha, I'm new to this too, and here's my advice: Find another crush. Sure, he probably won't hit it off in the same way you did with him, but you shouldn't let this get in the way of finding the one true to you. Its obvious he probably found somebody else, no its your turn to go out and find somebody better. Good luck!

Lol! Thank you for your advice! I have tried going out a few times and it never ends well. I end up thinking about this guy or talking about him the whole date. I try really hard not too, but it still happens. I feel bad for the other guy. I'm still friends with him and we talk every now and then. He always tells me he's still single and has no interest in anyone out there. He has told me several times he wished I still lived close to him so we could go out. I guess maybe that's what I have a hard time letting to of?

yes, i really think you are holding on to wishful thinking which is why you could not let him go. dont take his word for it. the sound of it, he is most likely committed to something or somebody and he is making all the excuses. crush is good.. but yours is infatuation. unless you love him for all eternity, then go ahead and take that leap of faith and be with him. otherwise, cmon.. yeah, find another crush. :)

I know this is an old post, but I wanted to tell you that I think it's important to remember that if it is true, you will both make arrangements that make it happen. You just have to try. If you have to, sell some of your things, save the money, and then buy things to replace that when you move wherever you need to go. It might be worth it, and I hope that bit of advice helps. You have options! You just have to be willing to change some things around. Maybe a job transfer to the other area where he lives would be good.