Deciding to cheat

Im 17 years old and I have a thing for older men. My mom has a friend and her husband is so manly. I started to like him. I started to hang around my mom to see him more. then one day he comes up to my cousin and I and starts to show his muscles , like lifting up his shirt ,and flexing.him and my cousin are like bestfriends.so I decide to leave and let them talk. when I come back my cousin tells me that he told him that he thinks im cute and that he likes me.then hes son tells me that he said that I look pretty,his son told me because he thought his dad was trying to insinuarse that I was perfect for his son .i was totally into him but I find out that he's cheating on his wife that he does drugs ,he hits her and that hes only with her because of her money . he's always looking at me ,trying to talk to me alone,always flirting with me but I try to act like m not interested but I really like him but hes also much older then me .he's 30, and he has 3 kids and will hes just wanna have sex with me or something serious ,but I cant get him out of my mind I have 3 years liking him, sometimes I find myself flirting with him and trying to seduce him I know its wrong but I don't know If I should go for it and just get it over with or still pretend to not be intrested

You are ok with liking older men but not one that is married with kids = too many hearts to hurt!