Why does my boyfriend not want us to break up this time?

We've been dating for 3 years now going on 4. We don't live together but I'm at his house more than I am mine, he doesn't bring me into his personal life with his friends or family I know his dad not mom n stepdad and a few extremely close friends and he goes out with his friends without me mostly (this part rarely matters as he claims he prefers to bring me out as a couple than around his friends) We break up alot but more like throwing the word around but neither of us leaves. He usually always says I know where the door is and never stops me. Last week he did something very hurtful to me this time I was really leaving undoubtably and I told him my mind thoroughly and after that he said he never realized he loved me so much and he wants to be with me forever and doesn't want me to go and he is sorry and he promises once he gets his life together things will get better with us because with things he likes to feel like a man. Yet 2 days after that it's like he was almost back to himself after I found out wat he did he made me feel like ok 2 days get over it but then he showed little remorse again but he did make known that he is in a place right now where he has to take care of him before he can fully take care of us. If he can't make changes now can I trust him even after I found out he cheated, and even though he has never made promises like this to me before could they be sincere or is this a game to him? Was he that sweet because he realized I was going and never in 3 years when I said I was going he always never cared regardless for wat even this is the first time he begged me to stay.... Sorry for the long explanation :( feels like I'm going out of my mind need good advice, more of what do you think of the situation I don't want to know if I should leave or not but what is up with him, also he is about 16 years older than me which from older men I expect more mature behavior and stability and don't need to hear about age just need advise it is hard 3yrs starting 4 is hard to go, we are coming from so far and over time he does give a little but just not enough, also his specific words to me are he wants me to know he does appreciate me and everything I do for him, even sexually I am his best what I do to him in all his life no other woman has and he loves me alot his head is just in a bad place, so I just want to know what you think of this

is this the guy u would want to spend ur life with,see your future with,speak freely with him,your requirements.

I have talked with him freely about my requirements :( sometimes I do feel like this is the person I want to have in my life forever but after all he has done all my thoughts have become distorted and I'm not sure anymore, a bigger part of me wants to leave but there is another smaller part making it hard because I do love him so torn

sometimes people can fall for wrong ones unsuitable or illmatched and later regret,you decide