Confidence

Hi haven't done this before so I get to it. I am in my mid twentys and 4 months ago I broke up my relationship of 5 years. For my job I have to work away a lot of time. But kept a good relationship in the early days, she said I had an intresting job. 2 years into the relationship we moved in with each other. It was working so until 3 months ago . When I came back after time away a bit early,wanted to supprise her. When I got back I found that she was in Spain on holiday so I dug about . In a long period I have been in la la land not asking or cheking on finacial part I trused her, I know it is my own fault but that is not the issue. In a period of 1 and half years when I have been away she had started a new relationship and started taking money away from me on holidays for her and this bloke and stopped paying rent so as it stood I owed 1 and half years rent I don't know how we didn't loose the place but that long. There was a lot of other goings on aswell. The relationship wasent one where we did not see each other my company would fly partners out as often as they could do really the longest we would be apart is not even 2 weeks. I waited for her rerun and confronted her and ended it but then I got called away. Oh the big surprise that I had given notice at work and only had 3 weeks left. When I returned I found flat empty all my belongning gone nothing left and a lot of lies about me. Wich in a short period I had to leave my home and family who I don't speek too now. That is the background, the problem I'm having is that I loved her and still do I can't stop thinking about her. I'm not sleeping well or not at all, just everything reminds me. I do get angry that's only human but why after all this do I still want to be with her. I not looking for an answer but a bit of advice of somone who has been there or just frendly get on with it. But know anyone who can shed some light on why or what to do I would be greatfull because I'm all out. Thank you

Hello there .. I just want to say that I think it's disgusting that your ex did this to you :( you really are better off without her and could never trust her again :( it will take time to heal honey and time is a great healer .. You need your family and friends around you and look at it as a blessing you found out x who ever she is will sure get her karma back one day too so try to build yourself back up little by little and one day you will be ready to meet a lady again and learn to love again with the ex as massive life learning lesson like a lot of do :( hope this helps some way :) god bless xx

Hi thanks for the reply. It made sense the problem is that she has left me with nothing she has managed to turn most family away by lying and when I not there to defend myself I can\'t do anything about it . I know in time it will get better but at this time I decided well really had to almost 200 hundred miles away from everything I have known. Sorry I\'m going on now but this is the only way I can talk, I do have friends who are also colleagues but in my work I have to try and put it all away, hide it. Again thank you

It's me again :) don't hide away or not talk about it honey and it's good to get it off your chest it's awful what has happened to you and it's good to talk and confide in close friends :) xx

Thanks again for responce. U know its better to talk about what's on your mind, I tell people to do it, its a case of practice what you preach. I'm in an environment where you have to be focused and in control of your self and if in a team to be sure of them. That is what I'm used too. Sorry but this feels good to ramble on like this

Hopefully your environment will be beneficial to you as you need to be work focused and by the sound of it very busy too. When I had a 5 year relationship break December last year I was very broken too and found sinking my head into work helped .. The lies she has told must hurt as you feel so betrayed but the truth comes out in the end and people will realise what she really was like :) week by week you will get stronger and feel better honey and the good thing is hopefully you won't have to see her no more !! If u ever need to chat about it message me :) hope u keep your chin up and keep a smile on !! Many regards x

Thank you that what I have been doing is working all hours in the day. My current job I will be leaving iv done 4 months notice, I want to settle in one place be normal. Thank you for your kind words. How would I message yourself . Many thanks sjw

Hello I think it will do you good to have a fresh start honey .. I have friends were distance is a issue in their relationship through work :( but we all need to work and either way you have to have trust in any relationship wether you work away or not .. I think you can private message in the chat place ? Went in there for 5 mins but was far too fast for me haha :) are u not working now ?

I always thought long distance can work you just have to work at it more and you fine it can be rewarding. I wull finished working for my company at end if month then will decide where I want to go and settle. I'm not one for tech either its all to quick now a days I still prefer letter writing .