The hardest part isn't holding on, it is not knowing what I am holding onto..

Hi there, I am writing because I am very lost and confused at this time. The story is very long but I will cut it short. I chose to seperate from my daughters father 1 year ago due to his severe anger management issues. Since then I had found out that he was cheating on me for the whole duration of our relationship including my pregnancy with our daughter. Ofcourse This was shocking news to me as I was completely an utterly fooled. What makes this even more shocking is that he was having an affair with another man. There is absolutely no doubt as I know for certain because of the evidence I have seen. He initially denied it all, then he tried to cover it up as being a woman not a man but then he opened up and spoke about childhood sexual abuse being the root of his behaviour (which I will not get into). He tells me that he is not gay/bisexual or anything of the sort and in fact gets very aggressive and somewhat defensive when I naturally questioned his actions. I love this man very much but I am finding it extremely difficult to believe his story. I do not want to give him another chance and put my heart on the line again if he is truly in the closet homosexual. Any insights would be greatly appreciated. Thank you very much.

Well I can't say that I've been there before. I would go with your gut instinct. It's usually right. Even if it WAS a woman, would it be forgivable? Can you believe anything he says anymore? I think most women, just need someone to back up what their intuition is telling them. I say cut him loose and find someone who will only want to be with you.

Thank you very much for your insight. My gut is telling me that he is not being truthful, but my heart is not ready to let him go. I wonder that If he was capable of living a deceptive double life, he is certainly capable of being untruthful again to win me back, right? I feel so torn in what to do. I believe that everybody deserves a second chance if they are 100% willing to make it right and change. It isn't the forgiveness that is the hardest part, it is not being truly sure of his true identity/sexuality. Regardless of what he wants me to believe I think i will live the rest of my life wondering. I believe that regardless of the decision i make i will be taking a huge risk either way, however i feel that if I don't give him and our family another chance, that I will live with regret for the rest of my life..