Time to end 5 yr relationship?

My boyfriend of 5 years and I met at the end of our college years. We've lived together for most of our relationship and get along great as best friends. We enjoy spending time together, we laugh together, we confide in each other, and still have common interests and beliefs/morals. We've been open about discussing anything, even future plans (i.e. wedding, creating a family, etc). In the last couple years, we've begun to find some issues that we've tried to resolve. At first, it was that my bf was upset with the gradually decreasing amount of sex and affection he's been getting. This, I think subconsciously, was due to the fact that he was very unsupportive of my decision to pursue graduate school while working part-time, instead of continuing to work at a dead-end full-time job I had at the time. I didn't ask him to support me financially, but what hurt me was his inability to give me other types of support as I completed my graduate studies. I received no encouragement or occasional help with my share of the chores during finals times. While in graduate school, my bf's mother died from alcoholism and I was there to support him emotionally and be the logical/rational half as he went through the motions of grieving and funeral arrangements. Two months prior to her death, we found out that her alcoholism resurfaced and I even offered to temporarily move to care for her, which he kindly refused. Again, we've talked about his unsupportive nature already, but I feel that he's quick to shoot down or criticize any ideas I have. He doesn't tell me that I should or shouldn't do something, but it's clear when he's displeased with an idea I propose. In our more recent talks, more affection from me and more support from him are consistently on our "improvements list". During the winter holidays, I traveled overseas (12-hr time difference) to visit my family for two weeks. I video chatted with my bf twice during that time and apparently, he was unhappy with the lack of "I miss you"s from me and had hoped that we would talk more frequently. Note that on the 2nd video chat, we had prearranged to chat when it turned 2014 on his end. He didn't answer because he was drunk and I chatted with him the next day. I figured he was ok with the infrequent chatting since he was fine with missing a video chat appointment with me to get drunk instead. Honestly, it had been nearly 10 years since I last visited my hometown so I was too excited to miss him. There were many times when I thought "I want to show this to my bf next time we visit together". During my visit, I learned that my older brother had moved back in with my parents (who are old enough to be my grandparents) and had regressed to his irresponsible and selfish way of living (think, rebellious/spoiled teenager in the body of a 30-yr old). While he poses no physical or much financial burden on my parents, I don't want them to have any emotional stress from my brother's selfish ways. This is the feeling I came back with, so my bf was further upset by the fact that I didn't seem very happy to be back from my "vacation". When I talked to him about my family situation, he said that it's not something I have control over, nor is it my place to say or do anything about it (which I disagree with. I'm also my parents' child and I SHOULD be worried about their well-being). Despite me not having come to an emotional conclusion on this, he then turned the topic around to us: whether I was a flight risk in our relationship; will I up and leave our future child to care for my parents if they should fall ill. For the last 24 hours, I've been thinking about whether we'll actually work out well together in the long-run. Everything else is great in our relationship except what I mentioned: he's overly dependent on affection from me and a lack of it results in less support from his end, which then results in less affection and sex from me. In regular day to day, I feel like I give him normal amounts of affection (holding hands, hugging, kissing, putting my hand on his knee or leg when we're sitting next to each other), but when we talk, he says it's not enough or doesn't even realize that I've given him any affection at all, which doesn't encourage or motivate me to continue trying. After reading some "relationship advice" articles online, I feel like it may be best to break things off, but I'll talk to him about all of this again when he comes home from work today. What are your thoughts on this? Thanks in advance.

LYSSA - Wow, this could be my life you are talking about, except for the graduate degree (something I did not do because of the lack of support). For me now its 15 yrs later and nothing has changed! I am now going to leave as soon as I have saved the money I need and perhaps will pursue that graduate program I missed before. I have said nothing about this and will not until I am ready to walk. My advice - get out now and avoid all the drama of the past 10 yrs I've had! Good luck but you are a strong person so luck will not play a big part! Whatsup

Your boyfriend of 5 years, although fun to be with and your best friend, is very immature and selfish. It was your decision to better yourself by going to graduate school and if your relationship was sound, then your boyfriend would have supported you to the hilt. After all, you've discussed future plans together and if you're in the box seat to score a better career with superior qualifications.... His reaction of complaining about reduced attention from you, real or imagined on his behalf, says it all. His missing your pre-aranged video chat is another sign of his "commitment" to your relationship with him. Something else was more important...and what an 'excuse'. You received no help with the usual household chores etc is one more sign of his insecurity and just what he actually thinks of you. Actions speak. He is just taking you and the relationship for granted. He wants his cake and wants to eat it as well. If he is overly dependent on you for affection, as you state, then he is shackled to you. Instead of you being in a 2 way street relationship, at present, you are the only one contributing to it. Yes, you should be concerned about your parents situation regarding your bro, but his problem is his problem and if your parents are happy to have him there..if they're not, that's when you should act. Your boyfriend is blaming you for the past, present and his perceived possible future obstacles to your relationship. He is predicting the relationship. You've stated you had a look at this forum and similar answers to similar issues and the answer to your issue you already know. You are a very caring person but you need someone who will let you do just that... without having a worry in the world of who you are, who accepts you for just being you without putting a price on it.