Grudge?

I forgot to mention, i am a girl. How should i feel if my close friend (homo) is being nice to my first love ? First love left me for another guy, send me to depression and came back to me on and off whenever she feels lonely. She became friends with the homosexual friend when she left me. Turn to her whenever she is lonely too. Me and homosexual became friends after she treated homosexual coldly (god knows why, cause i don't) Me and homosexual became good friends actually. But in the recent events, first love is asking for a meet up with me. i am hesitating but homosexual (which i thought disliked her) already met up with her. I feel somewhat betrayed? Because i honestly loved her and genuinely still hate her? I don't even know. I am confused about this feeling i am feeling. Anger, betrayal, annoyance at the existence of any of them. I can't even

Dear ZEN, You are confused, hurt and lonely because your relationship failed. It is easy to transfer your anger on your friend or whoever else in your life right now. The best thing to do is to isolate yourself from your ex. Do not allow the relationship to yoyo back and forth because your heart will suffer right along with it. Rather, stay away and give yourself time to heal. If your friend is hanging out with the ex, then stay away from their meetings and explain to the friend why - that you are staying away from the ex in order to recover. That way the friend does not take it the wrong way. When recovering from heart break, try to find something to focus on rather than just stay home and be sad and lonely. Instead, dress up and find something interesting to do: read lighthearted books, watch funny or encouraging shows or movies, get a part time job or volunteer work. Distract your mind and give yourself time. You will recover. For a short term relationship, it takes two to four months. A longer relationship may take up to a year to recover from. You know you've recovered if one day you realize that you don't remember the last time you thought about this relationship. Activities to avoid: eating/shopping too much, going into drugs or alcohol, or diving into a "rebound" relationship. Good luck and God bless. Dr Shamp