Wife unsupportive

Bad title I know but that's pretty much what it boils down to we have been together 8 years married for 6 and have 2 boys aged 2 &5 who are great. I work full time my wife part time she tends to work weekends I work mon-fri so have the boys all day sat and Sunday my wife works in healthcare on 14 hour shifts. We don't get a lot of alone time obviously and sex is practically non existent - we don't even share a bed my wife sleeps with one of the boys and I end up with the other one who won't stay in his bed - I love my wife and want to have what we used to have but she can't be bothered I know people say why don't u do chores and crap like that but I do most of the cleaning and cooking while she buys the boys clothes and stuff cos I'm rubbish at that - tried to arrange babysitter etc but wife wd rather go out on her own / not sure what to do next??

Hi just take thing a little slower....... how about just do random nice things for her. Like fill her a bath, with candles the works..... just little things up and down without asking for anything in return .... Do this for a month or so, she needs to be still treated as a woman you dated.... Get the spark back up again...... just stay in the moment with her...... let it happen naturally..... otherwise you will end up having sex out of obligation....

Your title says it all Datco. Take two steps away from your post and look at your marriage from a distance. Go back to your early days where you each made a commitment to one another and ask yourself if that commitment is still there. Ask yourself if you still have the communication, trust, love and respect being reciprocated to each other all the time. If your wife can't be bothered to make an effort for you guys to have what you used to have, then it's time to discuss with her what her thoughts really are of her marriage. It doesn't matter what your personal circumstances are and who works when and where, all that matters is..are two people still making the effort to get it to work? are two people supporting each other? are their priorities the same? When you make the effort to organise a babysitter but your wife stymies your plans, then it's time to ask her to communicate truthfully with you because, above all else, you both have two young children to nurture.

Speak to her first! It is common for women to get so engrossed in child care that men feel left out. See if she agrees with you that time together is getting non existent? If she is, then ask her to put the boys to bed early at night and then you both spend time together. Kids will sleep soundly for the first few hours of night before they wake up and start bothering parents. Make use of those hours. Also your kids are small so they tend to sleep well into morn. Make it a habit to wake up early and use that time for the emotional bonding. Weekends is anyways family time as boys will be home full day.