Ex-girlfriend on the mind

My Ex and I have been broken up for 6 months now and I always tell myself I'm over her and everything but every once in a while I might have a nightmare that involves her or she might text me out of the blue for like five or ten minutes and once she has contacted me; whether it be in my dreams or on my phone, I can't get her out of my head for a good while after. It brings back all the regret I had for our break up and I start wanting her back and start getting the feeling that I should talk to her, but I have tried telling her(months ago) I still had strong feelings for her and she said just to get over it. I mean here she is telling me that she has been spending the months after our break up trying to get over me, even though she told me she still loves me and cares about me. Details about the events before and then our break up (In case it helps) - We had been dating for over 2 years, going through the roller-coaster that is a high school relationship, and then I went to Parris Island, SC for boot camp for 3 months and I only got to talk to her through letters while I was there, then I graduated and got to come home for ten days and we were happy as can be. Then I had to leave again to continue my training at Camp Lejuene, NC for another month, and I only got to send one letter to her (she never sent one back) but I got my cell phone at the end of training and I called her and everything was still fine, and we were still happy but I didn't get to come home before I headed to my next segment (I guess that word works) of training, which was in Fort Lee, VA. I got to use my phone there though, I called and Skyped her every night (well every night we both could), that is up until this female that was also training with me started be drawn to me (which I didn't see at the time.. I'm very oblivious) and the day I got promoted, she kissed me, just out of no where; but I pushed her away immediately and I called my girlfriend and told her that night what had happened. Once I heard her cry I broke on the inside, I told her I just needed a break to figure this out and I told her I didn't deserve her anymore; so (being the idiot I was) I broke us up (only on a temporary note, we both agreed on it; it was mutual and everything). So for a few days everything was okay, I was getting to forgive myself for that kiss and my girlfriend wasn't mad at me (She said she wasn't mad at ME to begin with) and we were okay. Till one day, the girl that kissed me posted a picture on Facebook of us (nothing sexual, we were just sitting next to each other and smiling at the camera.. a normal picture.. and it had been taken days before the kiss happened) and added this one content that I was the greatest girl to enter her life and she wouldn't know what she would do if she hadn't met me (a bunch of crap now that I look back at it) and I knew that would end it between my girlfriend and myself if she saw the picture, so I told the girl to take it down and she said "it's not letting me" (I know now, and actually a day later that all of that was nothing but BS) so of course my girlfriend sees it and (this is where it gets hard for me to say, even on an anonymous website) I cried.. my girlfriend texted me saying stuff like "oh really, that's how it really is between you two", etc. So I literally drop my phone and walk out the door to get fresh air. And while I go do that, she girl and a guy, her helper basically, take my phone and start texting me girlfriend saying stuff like "You will find another guy", etc; making it sound like I was over her; and that's when we were officially broken up.. Because this girl wanted me to date her so bad that she, and her helper, ended my 2 year relationship with the girl I loved. I almost broke the guy's neck that helped her and I cut her out of my life after that moment. When I tried to get a hold of my girlfriend (now Ex) to tell her what really happened, she wouldn't respond. So, time pasted and I finished my training with a heavy heart, I went back home and tried to talk to her and explain but she wouldn't take to time to come meet me face-to-face so I couldn explain all of it in person. See I'm the kind of guy that wants to give respect and, I felt the best way to tell her was to wait to meet in person, she deserved to hear to in person in my opinion. So I held onto the information until I realized she never would see me again, she wouldn't take the time out of her day to come talk with me. SO I sent her every detail through text and she was pissed for two reasons. 1) The obvious one, that those two were (how she put it) A**holes and 2) I had not told her that information sooner.. but I tried to explain that I just wanted to talk in person but she never gave me the chance. So I guess what advice I'm trying to get is.. Should I tell her that I can't stop thinking about her once she is on my mind and that some part of me wishes we were still together? Oh, and I hope be that whole story you don't think I'm like obsessed with her and I stalk her and stuff like that, because I definitely don't.. I even started talking to someone else and we are hitting it off rather well; we aren't dating right now but we are becoming very good friends and we have both displayed "want to be more than just friends" signs of affection (We've actually said it on numerous occasions as well). I don't want to mention it to her yet because I don't want her to be taken back by it, I don't want her to question how I truly feel about her, because, to be honest, I am starting to fall for her. I just want some way to have peace with myself and my Ex. Should I cut off all ties of communication with her? I really need help here guys.

I'm a Reservist, but I don't put anything before my work, I worked hard to become a Marine, and I will be damned if someone thinks they can take that away from me. My military life isn't a problem, it's a personal life that is twisted And it's not that I let the military women control me, she did everything behind my back in fact, she didn't consult with me or even tell me what she did until AFTER the fact.

Unless I have misintepreted things but it seems like you didnt have a relationship with the other woman? She kissed you and you pushed her away? So if that is the case then no cheating took place and you were faithful to your ex. You have now put forward your version of events/innocence to your ex so therefore your consceince should be clear and you should have some peace of mind. And, she could have said to you at that point that she was willing to see you OR even give it another go but she didnt. If I were you, I would leave the situation the way it is. If your ex does, and im not saying she will but if she does reject you then that could leave you feeling worse considering you have told her already how you feel but her words are 'get over it'. If you still feel you cant get her out of your mind then maybe you should mention to her in a subtle way that there is someone else interested in you and maybe see her reaction. Continue with this new found love of yours and try to let go.

I hope things have gotten better for you, but just in case your still in need of advice. I would suggest you move on. I know it's hard to do and your used to thinking about her all of the time. Re-wire your thinking. One main point is that you did nothing wrong. You told her the truth and she decided to react the way she did. Therefore, she does not see a romantic future with you. I feel as though she is torturing you by still keeping in contact with you. There is a difference in action and words. She's giving you mixed signals; on the one hand she's telling you that she still loves you, still texts you, but on the other she's trying to get over you yet she's texting you. Please move on so you can be a lot happier!

Thank you K and VIV, I am happy to report I have finally moved on with my life and have my Ex completely out of my mind.. Well to say I have fully recovered would be a lie, I mean I dated her for almost all of high school, so it will take time to be 100% over her. But I am making very good progress!

And that is a start!!! Glad things have worked out and thanks for giving us the update. Just remember, with time, it will get easier. Good luck and all the best :)