What is he thinking

I'm a normal 40ish woman, well educated and have been married for 19 years. I have known a man, a friend for the past 25 years, a friend of my brothers. We do not live in the same area, but when I visit my family where I was born, we go out in a group of friends. I probably only see him once every 6 months, but there has always been strong chemistry between us and we have always got on famously. Over the past year I have spent a large amount of time at my family home due to various family problems. During this time I have spent a lot of time with him, sometimes with other friends sometimes on our own. The chemistry has been as strong as ever, and in October last year we kissed. It was very passionate, and quite unbelievable. Between October and January this year, we shared various moments, but we did not get sexual. I am not happily married, but cannot finish my relationship with my husband until my other family issues are resolved. He is fully aware that my marriage is broken, and we have talked about it often. In February this year, we started to get intimate on one occasion and he stopped and said 'no' you are married, and since then, we have not had any physical contact ie kissing. We still get on well, and he still asks me out to lunch and we go out with friends. We have not spoken about the subject since, he is not good at showing his emotions and opening up, he is a real man's man. He sometimes looks at me as if he wants to say something, and at the weekend we were at a party and he said I looked really good. My question is really, when my marriage finishes, will he want to reignite the relationship. Is he still interested in me or is he just being nice because we have been friends for so long, and does not want a relationship with me. Thoughts please

Hello, I know you said you're having marriage troubles. I see you have chemistry with another man. Tell me prior to kissing this other man had you ever done anything like that before since you've been married? You said you started to get intimate but he wouldn't have sex with you because you're married. If he would have wanted to would you have?

Hi. No I have never done anything like this before, and I probably only did it because I know the another man so well, and for such a long time. I don't know whether I would have or not. I think probably not, because even though I want to, I believe that I have to finish the other relationship first. He was actually at the pub with my brother on my hen night, and when we had a conversation a few months ago, he said that he was going to ask me out 20 years ago before I started seeing my husband, and that I never really loved him and why did I marry him. What do you think??

I forgot to say, just a minor point but I can see a future for us, I want to be with him all the time

Hello, are you absolutely certain that you wouldn't have f***** this man even though you're married? I know a lot of women who've cheated on their husbands & visa versa. I'm not saying you're 1 of them but it sounds like you would if given the chance of never getting caught. I hope you don't take offense to that as I think that's kinda sexy! That being said if it's true you never loved your husband then why did you marry him? A hen night huh lol! Sounds promising lol! So you can see a future with this guy then? Well then & this may sound bad but maybe you should test the waters a bit. What do you think? I think that if you truly never loved your husband then you certainly never should have married him. I think that's just asking for things to happen which obviously they already have to a certain extent. I'd very much like your feedback on my post.

I understand your comments. I would really like to know why he didn't go through with it and what he is thinking now

what do you mean by test the waters??

He might have been reluctant to go through with it because of fear of your husband finding out. Other than that I'm not sure because I would have jumped on you lol. So by your comments I assume if you knew 100% that you'd never get caught you'd f*** this guy wouldn't you? Even though you're married? Wouldn't you? Please be honest. It's ok & it doesn't make you a bad person at all. What I mean by test the waters is find out about other men.

Describe to me what you look like so I know about this other guy. Are you his type do you think? Has he told you that you are?

No I wouldn't have. Yes I am his type. So what is he thinking ?

Well like I said he's probably thinking about getting caught. Are you afraid of that as well? Now if you're not into your husband & you're into this other guy then why wouldn't you have let him have you?

I actually totally agree with SuzieQ

Even though he knows your marriage is broken, he has never once mentioned that he would be there for you in future? Is there some other lady he is interested in now other than you? Probably thats why he didn't go on? His statement that 20 years ago he might have asked you but he is talking only of a past not a future together.