Facebook and exes

Hi there, I am a 40 year old who has been in a relationship with my partner for over a year now. I am in the process of moving in with him, some 500 miles from where I currently live. I am selling my home, rehomed my pets, resigned from my job and start a new job in the new location soon. I have two grown up children that I will be moving some distance from also. I am deeply in love with this man and I believe him to feel the same. My problem is that he wont delete/block his ex from his facebook. I do not use facebook myself so I am not quite sure of how it works. We have had two conversations about this before. It bothers me. It upsets me and hurts me. I do not understand why he even cares. He broke up with her. He knows it upsets me, agreed to do something about it as it is a deal breaker for me. I spent most of summer there and still, she is on his facebook. He says they dont communicate often. I feel like I am losing my mind a bit on this one. Am I over reacting? I am too close to the situation to see it rationally? Am I asking too much? Being immature? Please help advise me. Thanks x

If you are prepared to totally relocate and put distance between yourself and your own adult children, then you are totally accepting this man to be with him. Your relationship of mutual deep love should be unconditional. Why are you worrying about his contact with his ex because you DO know about it and it's not a secret he has kept from you. He's been open about it. You need to discover the reason why he is still in contact with her because plenty of people still need to talk to their exs after they have moved on and plenty of people still care about their exs as people for various realistic reasons. If he knows that it upsets you then he needs to know the REAL reason why you are upset and hurt by it. Likewise, you need to know WHY he still talks to her however rarely. You need full communication in your relationship with him. If you love and trust this man completely, enough for you to move half way across the country to be with him, then ask yourself why his contact with his ex is a deal breaker for you in the first place.

Arctic,you have resigned from your job, rehoused your pets, you are selling your home, moving from your grown up children so don't you think it is a little too late for you to be thinking about these issues? You should have made sure your partner blocked his ex from his fb before you began the above process.

You are all right, I am so stupid. And so screwed. I cannot get over this, wont move, and as such, no job, no means to pay bills etc. who knew keeping exes was a thing?

No you are not screwed. Some people do keep in contact with their exs and as Manalone has pointed out, many people keep in contact for all sorts of reasons. But, in your situation, it clearly does bother you and if that is the case, do something about it now before you finally do lay all your eggs in one basket.