Need help don't know what to do

Hi iam new to this but don't know where to try i have 7 year old and my ex is always abusive to me saying i am a bad mum and he will take her off me and call social service on me and it is woorse than that but dont want to talk about that wright now how do i go about getting some round to see ny pace and say i am doing a good job to shove it in his face and to give me piece off mind iam so unhappy right now and i think he is mucking her head up we did go to lawyers but emotional cant handle it again just in case he won i think i would just die pls help

I think that relying on your lawyers is about all you can do at this point. You might also want to work on making sure that your daughter is not negatively affected by the litigation. Whatever you do, don't ever force her to take sides and let her know that this is a problem between you and her father (presumably).

I can totally empathise with your situation. My now ex husband walked out just after christmas 2012. We have 3 children. I always had a deep deep fear that if we ever split he would try to take my kids. Shortly after he left he reported me to social services saying that I stayed in bed all day and allowed the children to play with knives. I received a call from SS regarding it. I was mortified and terrified. (of course his allegations were a load of rubbish). Social services had contacted my children's school to make sure all was ok and the school reassured them and told them the kids were well adjusted, fed and clean. In fact they said that the kids were doing better since their father had left the home! I felt vindicated. Since then I heard from his girlfriend (when they broke up and she called me up) that he was grilling the kids for any bit of info he could get to use against me "does mummy drink a lot of wine?" is one example. (sorry at work and it got busy - wuill finish this in a min!)

Meanwhile, please enjoy this Hold music: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6g4dkBF5anU :-D

Sorry about that - customers - tsk! Yes so basically I was very aware that if he could take them he would take them (although now I think even that's not true) It's an awful awful feeling but it is unfounded. I spoke to a solicitor during my divorce and she assured me that it couldn't happen. Her words were "even if he owned a solid gold house he wouldn't get the kids, a judge would be more likely to tell him to give you the solid gold house so you could look after the kids in it" Bottom line - a court likes to maintain the status quo wherever possible. They won't disrupt a child's life/routine/ sense of security unless they have to. So if a child has 2 perfectly good parents then the child stays with the one it is with already. Even if your partner is a BETTER parent than you the child stays with you! The only time the child would be removed from you is if you were not catering to the child's basic needs (I.e the child was malnourished, left alone for days on end, consistently not taken to school or abused etc) Example My sister suffered from manic depression. So much so that she couldn't take her kids to school some days - did they take her kids away? NO They arranged for a taxi to pick them up and take them - she didn't even have to get dressed - she just had to get them fed and dressed and wave them off from the door. I think my ex just wanted to feel like he still had some kind of control. He does things now like tells my daughter she can go to a secondary school on the other side of town (I don't drive). It used to bother me - it doesn't anymore. I know I am the one constant in their lives, been there since before day one, they know it too and though he would never admit it - so does he. Just know that the threats are from a place of fear on your ex's part not from a place of any power - in fact it is the opposite. How long have you been broken up? Does he see your child regularly etc? Don underestimate the bond between mother and child - it's probably the strongest bond there is and that's why your fear is real. Any threat to that bond is going to feel like a massive worry to you and cause you anxiety and your ex knows that as well which is another reason why he does it. Try not to worry HE WONT BE ABLE TO TAKE YOUR CHILD I had to be told that a few times before it sunk in.

I agree with Susie. Keeping your child isn't the issue but him playing on that fear is! Knowing that he has zero chance of doing that will put the power back into your hands and as Susie says - next time he suggests it just laugh.

Hopingfor I think you have Soulmate confused with someone else ..... Just saying!