Abuse.. is it my fault?

hi this is my first post, im hoping to get some advice on my relationship. i have been with my partner for 5 years now and we have a three year old daughter together. obv there is alot to the whole relationship but im sure you dont want to have the read all that so ill skip to the main points, in 5 years we have been very rocky what started off as a head over heels romance now feels like im trapped in an unstable loveless relationship. my partner has anger issues he wont address and instead blames me for everything that goes wrong, i work, cook, clean and take care of our daughter single handedly while he sits on the play station day and night, he hasn't lifted a finger to do any chores in our whole relationship as its 'the woman's place to keep the home tidy' he has never bathed or dressed our daughter ever! he fell out with my mum 2 years ago and stopped me from having any contact with them. we moved away from the town i grew up in and all my family live, i dont drive he does but always finds excuses to why i should not go through my test. i dont see my friends or family and he makes me feel bad if i say i would like to go for coffee with the girls. i havent been out without my daughter as he likes me to take her with me everywhere. he tells me im not allowed to go out for nights out so i haven't for years he doesn't trust me (i have never given him reason to not) he calls me names and says the most disgusting things about my family. he has wished me dead and even threatens to kill me and hide my body so ill never rest, and my family will never get to say goodbye. when we moved away is when the abuse got more intense, he acts like a parent and tells me off and punishes me if i do something wrong. he has strangled me, punched me all over my body, slapped me, gave me black eyes and even backed me into a corner when we where arguing and gave me 3 seconds to answer him without being sarcastic b4 'whipping me like the disgusting dog i am' with leads from his games console across my legs and back until i bled. now threatens 'do i need to get the lead to make you see how upset i am?' when i talk back. i have tried to leave but he destroyed my house throw the sofa at me dragged me by my hair down the stairs whipped me and punched me in the face. he tells me that i havent even been 'hit' yet and ill fuxxing know it as hell smash my face in until i stop breathing. he tells me im stupid, thick dumb and crazy, he wouldnt trust me to leave and let my daughter stay with me. he has threatened to take my daughter and never let me see her and to set fire to my parents homes if go. he is always going crazy mad over things like i brought the wrong mince (pork instead of beef) for spag bol he threw the dinner over me called me names and when back upstairs. he has rubbed food, burgers through my face and hair when my daughter wouldnt sit and eat her lunch as its my fault she wouldnt listen. i feel like no matter how hard i try nothing i ever do seems good enough. he calls me a lazy whoxe when the house is untidy but i work untill 2am some nights and am up with my daughter at 6:30am as he sleeps in until 11am. i feel like im walking on eggshells to stop the blow outs. i dont drink i dont smoke i dont go out i sit day and night in my house cleaning. the only break i get is a walk to the shop with my daughter to get dinner. i feel trapped and as if i cant function without him he has literally made me feel dumb i cant hold a conversation anymore i have lost who i used to be i dont fight back anymore i even appoligise for my behaviour when i dont see i have done anything wrong just so i can leave the room. i cry more than i smile, i just dont know what to do, he makes me feel im in the wrong and i deserve everything i get. even arguments where i am completely in the right he will turn so im in the wrong? so my question to you is should i leave? and do i deserve this? is it normal? thankyou for reading x

Should you leave?!..yes you should asap, but do it safely. This guy has that many issues but they are his to do something about and you don't need to be with him while he descends further into his own personal hell. Ask your friends and family and the law, if possible, to help you get out.

You need to leave. Arguments are one thing but once you are being hit, it's time to go. Look to see of there is a women's abuse shelter. Have a well planned escape and make sure you have the protection you need. Have you reported anything in the past?

Those aren't arguments. They're abuse tactics, physical and emotional, including serious belittling, intimidation, total control, actual bodily harm, and attempts at total isolation. You are a battered wife, no doubt about it. And it is NOT going to get better, just worse. ...AS YOU'VE ALREADY WITNESSED. You are married to a serious, serious BULLY. A terminally unhappy TODDLER in grown-up man's suit who thinks you're put on this earth to be his personal punching bag. And once your daughter hits the age where 'Yes, daddy, no, daddy' becomes 'No' or 'But', he'll start on her. Phone your family, phone your friends, and tell them to come get you. Let's see him try to throw a sofa at you in front of THEM! Or failing that, phone a battered woman's helpline to get yourself rescued and placed into a refuge, but get out now while you (and she) still can. Do it for your daughter if not yourself. Because even if he doesn't start on her in terms of battering - her having to see and hear all of this or even grow up absorbing all the vibes, it'll f*ck her up long term, sure as eggs is eggs, and make it wholly likely that her adult years will be dysfunctional and miserable. That's how it works. That's why your so-called husband is like he is. Stop that parent-to-child legacy in its tracks. Get out NOW. I'm presuming you live here in the UK so: http://www.womensaid.org.uk/ Keep us posted.