So confused about him

i have been living abroad with my husband and three children for the past 17 months. he got made redundant after 11 months in april this year from the company that bought us over but now he is in work again.i never told anyone what happened with his job and kept it in. things haven't been good and have been really stressful with being in a new country and paying out for household stuff, school fees etc and i relise we shouln't of come here but hubby just says to get on with it now and work together on being here. i haven't been intouch with my mother since she said something horrible about me or my father and i dont bother with the rest of my family. i do some agency work to get me out but i have no contacts what soever back home with anyone so out here i only have hubby and the kids. i feel like we are trapped here and this is it. me and hubby are having problems because i think he as cheated on me since we come here thou he denies it and because i can't talk to anyone about everything what we are going through and with me and hubby i feel like i will head for a break down, and at times i just want to walk out on it all and not come back but i have no where to go. my emotions have been like a rollercoaster since we arrived and there doesn't seem to be one day that doesn't go by where i don't feel low. i don't know what to do anymore about him and me as i feel so confused. one minute i want him the next i don't. he as got to go away for acouple of days with work and i feel jealous because i really need to get awat myseld from the house and day today things but we can't afford it. he will be gone for 3 nights and staying in a hotel and going on a plane to get there. i know i will feel even more lonely and isolated then which im not looking forward to one bit. can anyone offer there advise on all of this.

i wanted to say as awell that hubby said about me and the kids going back home but nothing about him coming with us. he said its because i want to go back but he once said if one wants to go back then we all do. i think it was awful that he said for us to go back but not him and this makes me think that he is only interested in himself and not me and the kids. i never thought he would say something like that or the thought of not even missing his kids if we did go home.

so waht do anyone think about this

Difficult one really - understand what you are saying, but don't know what to say. You are obviously not happy, and maybe the reason why your hubby has suggested that you leave the country with the kids is because he knows what it is doing to you. Maybe he is actually starting to get settled in his new job and his views have changed now that he has some sort of job security. You need to do what is right for you as a family, and if you really love your husband, then you will find a way of staying together, even if it means persuading him to go back home with you. But on the other hand, you said that you don't really keep in contact with your family, so what would you be returning to anyway. We often make changes in our life and live to regret it, but when children are involved and you love your husband despite thinking he might have cheated on you, then there is actually quite a lot you have to live for. Yes, money is a pressure for many families, and is one of the main causes of disruption to relationships and feeling low, so try to appreciate life more, and make the most of a less than ideal situation.