Only attract married men

Hi there. I am a 40 year woman old and i'm told very good lucking. I appear to have everything although I do struggle financially - everything was bought during the good times. When I was 20 I started a relationship with a man 10 years older than me. He was in a relationship. We are no longer together but are best friends for life although sometimes I think he has an expectation of me which I pass off fleetingly. The problem is that I can only attract men that are in relationships or married. I'm a lonely creature and don't have friends. I work a lot. Also my female friendships fell apart during my relationship with the older man. I crave attention but not intentionally with married men. The one I hoped would work out - transpires he is engaged now - I didn't know he was in a relationship. I suffer from anxiety and stress and I don't have the capacity to say no to these men. I really do try. I have never had a relationship with men who have children. I currently am having relations with 2 men (the one I didn't know was engaged) and another man who is married. To be honest - I don't think either of these give a dot about me. One can't resist me apparently and the engaged one just can't leave it alone. I have tried to not encourage him but it's such a small place where we live and through our work we can bump into each other. The other married man was working with me and I received really bad news that my father was dying when I was with him. Again through work and he was very kind to me. I know what I am doing is wrong and I would die if I thought someone was doing it on me or my sister - but I just do not have the capacity to end these relationships. I'm quite a high profiles business woman and I would be mortified if anyone found out about these. I have been approached by other married men as well and to be honest Im just really sick of it. And lonely, and why am I not good enough for someone to want me for me - I'm well liked and have a good heart. I dont mean to come across as self centred if i have - I just want to stop this vicious circle and don't know how to. I don't feel used by these men though I have no doubt that I am.