Is it wrong to check up on someone if your gut feeling tells you something ain't quite right?

I've struggled with my gut feelings that something isn't quite right for a while now. My boyfriend, whom i was with 30 years ago, and myself, got back together last summer, with him declaring his undying love and asking me to marry him, to which I agreed - we were gonna do this 30 years ago but we quite literally lost each other due to circumstances way beyond our control back then. He left his alcoholic wife and came and lived with me. Then after about 8 weeks, he decided to leave to go back, not to his ex wife, but to his house as he didn't want her to move her new boyfriend in... We got back together for a little while, all the time me thinking, 'well if he does it again, it's my fault for taking him back'. But I so wanted things to work between us. We've stayed friends, even getting back into bed with each other, with no say on his part whether or not the relationship has continued to this point in time - just an assumption on mine that we had got back together. However, it's different this time round. When we split in september, I met a man whom I had been chatting with online (as I do with loads of people), and we agreed to meet up. We got on really well, and have stayed in touch. Lately, my boyfriend has been acting rather distant to me, so I have backed off to let him do the running, and he does call - most days in fact, and we will be on the phone for hours, but this new guy wants to take me out too. I didn't want to make any moves in different directions till I knew that the intimate side was over between me and my boyfriend, as he will go for weeks sometimes without so much as holding me. However, this time, my gut feeling told me he was seeing somebody else...so I checked his emails and found quite a few emails back and for between him and an ex of his, with her telling him she loves him...also I was on the phone to him last night when I heard his mobile call, and he told me it was his brother. I checked his emails and found one from him to her saying at exactly the same time that his phone had packed up and to call his mobile...now I know he's lying to me... How do I confront this? and do I go out with this other guy who is well cute, though I don't know him that well yet...

I've only just found this forum and realise it's a bit late to be answering, though I see that no-one else has. You have probably already dealt with it. Personally, I would not confront him, I'd just say that you will be happy to see him again when he is divorced. You have shown good sense with the 2nd potential partner, in not wanting to get involved whilst you are still not clear of your old boyfriend. This is because there is only a 20% chance of making a good relationship if, at the beginning, either partner is still involved with someone else, especially if this involvement is marriage. This means that your ex- is not a good prospect, unless he is sufficiently serious about separating from his wife to divorce her. And really, you need to make him wait until the divorce is final. This ensures that he cannot take you for a ride.