Never Going to Forget How I Felt

So I dated my best friend of 10 years. We were together for four years. We've now been broken up for the last four years. Our break up tore me completely apart. It took about two years to really even start dating again. Another year of secretly thinking about him and crying myself to sleep some nights. Last year I had thought I finally came to terms with everything until he wanted to be my friend again. It took me 8 months from his first attempt to hang out as friends for me to finally agree to hang out. The second I saw him smile, I instantly just remembered how I felt when we were together. I know it sounds pretty immature but I am pretty sure he was my one who got away. I don't know if I'll ever be able to get over the love I had felt for him so I'm pretty sure I'm also going to lose a friend as well. I'm pretty good about hiding how I feel too but today just tore me up inside.

If your ex isn't interested in a relationship with you, and if you want to have a healthy, trusting, loving relationship with another guy at some point - then you need to cut-off your ex completely. You are far to into him.