Frustrated

This is my 2nd marriage, his first. My first marriage lasted 19 years and produced 3 kids. My husband has no kids and doesn't want any of his own. We have been married for 3 years, together for 7. For the past two years I've been asking my husband for more attention (especially in the bedroom.) This results in a fight. No matter how I approach it. I try to be sensitive. I try not to be insulting. I think his medication is effecting his sex drive and he says he's discussed it with his physician. Nothing changes. We end up fighting. I think I am a normally sexually active person. I'm not asking for it every day, just more than 3 times a month. When we were dating, we were very well matched as far as our sex drives. Now? I feel like I'm constantly asking for attention. There's always some excuse. He's tired. He works hard. It's always something. I brought it up Saturday morning, and of course, we argued. We finally talk through it and I feel like we get somewhere and we're right back in the same boat tonight. There's so much background. He's bi-polar. I stuck with him through are discovery of that and him getting help and on meds that help. Then he was an alcoholic. He stopped drinking. I stuck with him through that. Now there's just no closeness. I feel like he's constantly complaining about my kids. My kids are very well-behaved. But he nit-picks. My oldest is 18. She was home alone and we came home and he immediately complains that she left her recycling in the kitchen. She unloaded and loaded the dishwasher and ran it...but that goes unnoticed. I try to get him to focus on the good, he only sees the bad. I am tired of feeling like I have to defend my kids. I am tired of begging for attention in the bedroom. I am tired of WAITING to have the relationship I want. I waited through the bi-polar stuff. I waited through the alcoholism. Now I've been waiting for 2 years for a sex life I can enjoy. When do I stop waiting?

I too have this issue, with sex and nitpicking of children. I know that my wife while amazing at sex, doesnt truly enjoy it. So we dont have enough of it for my say. (Borserline sex addic myself lol) but she isnt comfortable with herself or sex due to abuse when she was younger. So I dont know if that is helpful at all, bit maybe aomething tramatic happened to your hubby and that is where the problem is......but talking about it will lead to a fight...so you're dammed if you do and dammed if you don't.