Personal family problems

My father has lost his job and is addicted to alcohol. After loosing his job he returned back to stay with us since den he keeps on drinking 24*7. All of us are very tensed and he fights and creates mess also often . He stays awake all night and keep on diaturbing others. We are not able to find any solution to this issue.. I am highly dipressed and not able to find peace of mind..

Hi PINKI, Who's 'us' - you and who else?

Me and my mother

So he and your mother were previously separated but she took him in out of pity after he lost his job?

No they. Were never seperated. ..my mother never even thought about leaving him . He was outside due to job transfer in gujrat from last five years but now he is back as he has lost his job.

Okay. Now for the next question: Why isn't your mum the one starting this thread? Why is it you think it's down to you? What's *she* doing about this highly unaccep-no, actually - ANTISOCIAL situation?

She is not keeping well and is busy with her job already

What does 'not keeping well' mean? Secondly, have you spoken to your mother about this so that she knows it's detrimenting your overall welfare?

Yes we both talk about this alot.actually my father drink n shouts at my mother also so only i can handle him but his continous drinking habit is non tolerable.my mother comes back home tired from work and then she needs rest but then she also gets tensed after coming back home. We have tried alot to explain and make my father understnd all thiss things but he is so much addicted that he is not able to overcome this habit of drinking . He is nott planning to apply for a new job also which is making the situation more worse. I mostly get dipressed aboout all this . Father drinking everytym .mother working hard and getting tired and my father also keeps on that he is not well . I m not feeling well this is paining that is paining but still he keeps on drinking and all he tantrums continous

1. What do you mean, only you can handle him? Do you mean, he turns off his anger the minute you step in? 2. Describe what 'handling' him, presumably successfully, means. 3. Sounds like your dad has finally given up the fight to drag himself out of that deep, dark well. And neither will he if he doesn't have to, i.e. your mother's not chucking him out with a warning that only a spell in rehab will get him a pass back in. Have you got any other relatives or anyone NOT worn down by him who can take charge? Alternatively, do you have a best friend whose parents you click with and would, if you explained without going into too much detail what's going on, let you move in with them for a while or until this gets sorted or even just a week regularly here and there so that you get a break from it all? 4. WHY isn't your mother telling him to leave, for your sake if not her own? Does she feel partly responsible for the state he's degenerated into?

My mother will never ever order him to leave us or will decide to leave him. We try to make him understnd spmetimes that atleast he should start looking for a new job somewhr . So that he can keep himself busy and stay healthy

Pinki, we'd get where we're going far faster if you could please ensure to answer all of my questions as well as directly? You've responded only to Q4.

I think the mom, or the teenager, needs to find a family counselor, psychologist, to help out here. Listed in the computer or telephone yellow pages.