Cousin's complex

This cousine of mine had been very short tempered and arrogent since she was very small.Istead of trying to bring her up properly,her parents pampered her even more.Her behaviour is very arrogant for which she has'nt got a single friend to talk.She keeps herself shut in her room all day,never speaks to anyone.Everyone at home does what she says and she is used to being waited on hand and foot,always ordering people around.But she never gossips with anyone for fun.For the last 10 years she has been living secluded from everyone thinking that she is too good to mix with ordinary people like family and friends.She had a breakup with her boyfriend about 7 years ago.Since then she had become even more drawn into herself,hardly ever coming out of her room.Everyone call this superiority complex but I have seen her through her bedroom window crying all the time she's alone in her room.She has been threatening her parents about committing suicide if she is not given exactly as she pleases.She's not been able to forget her boyfriend even now.Since the last 2 days she's been crying all day.She's shouting at everyone.If anyone says anything to her she's going quite mad and starts lifting chairs to hit them.She is eating talcum powder since today morning refusing to eat any food.She was even trying to set fire on the house.We are all very worried.She is absolutely refusing to see a psychiatrist.Please help.

Dear Jhora Not only does your cousin sound wild, but your description of her behaviour also sounds a bit suspect. If what you are saying is true your cousin sounds to be a danger to herself and others. I don't know where you live but if it is in the U.K you can call an ambulance because of the danger and your cousin could be sectioned in a mental health ward where she will receive the necessary treatment and medication to render her safe. Good luck Rosie.

My advice/opinion: If she doesn't want to mingle with others, make it so she has no choice, especially when it concerns her family. There is no one in this situation to tell her no. There should be. Issue about Seclusion: Mild: I would have family and friends go in her room frequently and talk with her until she spends more time outide of her room. Extreme: Remove the door knob or door from her room so she has no choice but to look at others. Take her room away until she decides to act like she should. DO NOT give her what she wants if she does not deserve it. DO NOT listen to her orders, she should not even have orders. Just say no. If she threatens to commit suicide again, the parents should tell her that they love her and would not want her to commit suicide but they are the ones who have the final say in what goes on in the house. Also, they could say " How can you get what you want if you commit suicide? What do you think is the value of what you want?" Then have her do something positive to get what she wants. Have her earn what she wants through behavior, allowance, family time, or chores. Everytime she does something that is not liked, take priveleges away or take items away, and tell her that she can have them back when she can act better than what she is acting now. If she shouts, refuse to talk to her until she can talk normally, and talk to someone else or ignore her until she stops shouting. If she starts throwing things around, do the same to the stuff in her room until she stops. Make sure to tell her what you are going to do to her room, and then do it. For the boyfriend problem, tell her there will be other guys and to focus on what is good about her. If she refuses to eat, take something away from her or do something that I have already mentioned that will get her to eat. If it means she no longer has her own room, she no longer has her own room. If all that doesn't work get her to a psychiatrist or seek some other help, stat! I hope I've been helpful. Good luck!