Father issues

I am 22 soon to be 23 year old female,and I think I just need to vent and hope other people can give advice or if they have the same problems. I live with my dad in a small house, I have been for nearly 2 years, before that I used to stay at my ex boyfriends a lot while I was at uni and before that I used to live with my mum, who died when I was 18 from alcoholism. My dad moved out during that time and I used to see him sometimes in the week or on Sundays. My dads life comprises of work and cars, we hardly talk to each other, I used to work full time elsewhere but it didn't work out, so he said I could work for him full time in the mean time while I look for other jobs. We hardly talk, I think because well he is always tired, snappy, grumpy from work, but when I say snappy and grumpy I mean he scares me to the point i shake, he is very controlling I have to reply with yes dad, can't say my own opinion because he is always right, he can't admit when he is not. I know he works hard but it seems like its completely consuming him, he runs his own business, and it is a constant fight to get money in etc. but he is doing really well, I wish he could switch off more when he got home and we could talk. When I try to start conversation, or just say how my life is going, sometimes he looks un-interested, he is watching tv and just tells me to shh if cars are on the screen, i do ask how is weekend is/was, how was car racing, but he just doesnt say a lot. I do have a plan though, I am working full time for him and saving up money to go travelling next year with my current boyfriend, I go to my boyfriends every weekend, and stay at my sisters once a week, I am saving well at the moment, and my dad has offered to make up the rest of my pay (as i am not getting paid amazingly) when I leave. I don't know how long i will go travelling for, hopefully some years, but I know I will do this, because I need to change my life a bit and spread my wings, I have been looking for other jobs and have applied for some things, but I don't want to ruin my chances of saving and travelling, if the job doesn't work out again. If anyone could give advice, or think i am doing the right things, it would be much appreciated, some days i feel like i dont know what i am doing and feel very lost.

I think you are doing the best you can of your situation. I think only you can decide if something is right or wrong for you. I will provide some advice that may be helpful to you. ABOUT YOUR DAD: People can have different personalities. Some are very expressive and others aren’t. Maybe you can set a specific day or time to talk with your dad. Let him know you understand his job is tough and see if there is anything you can do for him. Offer to get him something to drink or write something down for him to look at later (you could even leave a Post it Note on his drink with a Smiley face or a “Hope you had a great day!" on it, just to show you care). He may appreciate it. Sometimes staying out of his way is the best you can do. When he is at the TV, try to talk to him during commercial breaks or when he is flipping channels. You could try to make a few simple comments or jokes about what is on TV just to strike up some kind of conversation. If that doesn’t work, ask him what a good time to talk would be (“I got a problem, can we talk in ten minutes or so?). Also, since he thinks he is always right, sometimes the best thing to do is agree to disagree. At least you know his opinion, right? JOBS/TRAVELLING: I am glad you do want to improve your life and see what is out there. The best thing you can do is to take one day at a time. See where your priorities are. Do you want to travel and then deal with the job market later? Do you want to get a job and then think about vacation time later? Set goals and see what happens. Life is unpredictable… we can only do so much planning for it. Whatever you decide, be determined to make it happen. Make a back-up plan if necessary. If things don’t happen the way you plan, make the best of what you have and go from there. Believe in yourself. You will be okay. TILES