Am I assuming the worst?

In the past month, I have noticed how selfish and ignorant my boyfriend is being. He has no drive in life. He was out of work for six months, waiting for his " dream job" to open up in a landscaping company. He asks me to drive him to his friends homes, to pick up his dinner, to go shopping, etc. He does not have a car, so I always go to his home, he rarely comes to mine. He does not enjoy spending time with my family. He drinks alcohol almost every night, and now that he is working, he has become very unsocial at night when we are together. He only does things that bring himself happiness. We are in our late twenties, and he still refuses to open a checking account at a bank. He had very little concept of health insurance until I explained it to him recently. I am a teacher, and have tried to discuss what I am teaching with him, but he refuses to listen, saying that he isn't interested in what I teach. I have tried to leave him twice, but each time, he blames me, saying I expect too much from him,etc. I end up begging for him to forgive me, but for what? He has not always behaved this way. He has become an ignorant bum, but, I am a teacher living a structured life. Am I wrong to worry about his selfishness and ignorance?

leave him - I'm sorry - this may sound a little abrupt but what do you want for yourself ? what you write says it all : the writing's on the wall - he's not even interested in what you do : would you really wish this kind of relationship - for yourself ? don't listen to him trying to blame you for what he's responsible for - why explain things to him he's supposed to know about : he's not a 5 year old kid is he ? move on : you deserve better :)

From what you have said here you do not paint a very pretty picture, and it seems he is just 'having fun' and not looking for the same things you are. There must be something that keeps drawing you to him...what is it? Are his good qualities worth all the bad ones? Do you feel happy? From the sound of things I would say no, but sometimes it is easier to make these decisions when the heat of the moment has passed. If you find yourself unhappy, and feel like you are incompatible (he wants to party, you want something more serious) then it might be time to move on for good.

Thank you all for your words of wisdom. My head knows that our relationship will only lead to a unhappy life, but I still have such love for him in my heart. He has several good qualities, but eventually they will no longer outweigh the bad. I do deserve better!