Lost in love

Basically I'm in love with a married woman who is also my best friend and work colleague. She knows how I feel and I though she felt the same way. We have always been close and shared our secrets and thoughts. She is in a sexless marriage and when she needs affection she knows I'm there if needed. We have shared the odd moment but nothing to heavy until last week when she came onto me at work quite strong. She was all over me and I asked her if this what she wanted and she said yes. So we arranged to meet at mine the following night but she pulled at last minute and it was fine with me I only want her to be sure. However now it has emerged that she has been having secret texts with someone else at work the last 2 months and has admitted she wanted have sex with him but didn't. She has now stopped her texts with him as her secret got out and she worried her husband will find out. So basically I'm heartbroken that she was actually into someone else more than me and I have lost out and I'm really confused as to why she came onto me when she was wanted him Any advise would be nice.

Apart from the moral of it all, your best advice is to keep this woman at arm's length, particularly in the workplace. She is married and she needs to end it properly with her husband before she can go anywhere else successfully. You have discovered that there's others as well who she has attempted to be intimate with and you need to understand that none of you are any good for her at he moment whether it's for sex or emotional support because she needs to sort her marriage first and foremost. She's led you down the garden path to such an extent that you're heartbroken because she stood you up for another co-worker who's been treated the same shabby way. This is happening in the workplace and any respect you guys have for her is surely being eroded. In other words, she brings her personal problems to work, plays around with her colleague's emotions, and then expects everything to be rosy and then on top of that, she's worried her husband will find out! Above all else, when it's all said and done, take two steps back and ask yourself why your supposedly best friend would treat you like this.

Agree. Plus you only have her say-so that there's anything at all wrong with her marriage to begin with (aside from the fact that she's the type who thinks it's acceptable to cheat behind her husband's back rather than say 'Houston, we have a problem' or, if that failed, end it)...in other words, that entirely possibly (and I'd say so, the way she's behaving) the entire problem with her marriage is that she's one of its partners.

Yes I agree thanks for your comments it's nice to have others confirm what I already thought. Move on and if things change then see what happens but deep down I know she can't change the way she is and she will end cheating even if I was with her.

As any animal finds a mate, we must note what plan this animal has for its prey. Sometimes, we forget how close towards the animal world we are ans sex luke eating becomes a act for filling the belly or should i say soul. Desires, as hunger, becomes a quick meal in a animalistic measurement towards this conversation. Can you fault a hunger pain for desires to be satisfied? Will you note you we a taste for that moment? Can you notice you were the prey in a sexual hunt? Funny, being hungry can make you delirious if not what you want in hunger and sexual appetites are the same in action as hunger. Consequently, it was good to you and you desired more than just to be prey, but the meal all together. Trust the fact of that animal, it tends to hunt in the same places for its prey. They will come around when that appetite is not satisfied in taste. Maybe, you.will be that flavor again... Darn hunger pains... Set the bait, i bet the scent will draw them back...you both will have satisfaction..

Well done for pumping that mental muscle, DARK DAYS! Although you were tempted for a wee while there, you've obviously got your head screwed on right and are no-one's victim. :-)