Former friend could ruin by job prospects
NEWSHEAR - May 6 2016 at 23:06
Just wanted some advice on what to do in my situation.
Over ten years ago I became very good friends with a female colleague. We hung out, chatted for hours and went for meals together. After knowing her for two years, my feelings for her changed and I struggled to handle her rejection.
Ultimately we fell out quite badly and she became very bitter towards me for a few months, telling people she was looking for a way to get me fired (she tried to cause arguments with me by making snide comments so I would react, but knowing that was what she wanted, I never did).
I left the company and moved on. 18 months later I was working at a new business and saw an internal vacancy that was perfect for me. It was better money and was in the line with what I had worked in at my previous employer. The snag, my former friend had moved there a few months earlier. I didn't get the job and a mutual friend told me it was because my former pal had seen me in reception (this job was at a different office despite it being in same company as it's a massive global brand) and told the interviewer not to consider me because she felt I was only applying to be near her again. This was untrue, especially given that I had worked for this business longer than her.
Anyway, I did some new qualifications and moved to a rival business more than 30 miles away. I spent four successful years in that company before leaving to pursue a different career path.
Due to circumstances, I know want to return to that past job. I have the experience. I still have some friends there (although many have since left), and the position pays 30% more than I earn now, enabling me to press forward with my plans to buy a house with my long-term girlfriend.
But guess what? My old friend from more than a decade ago has in the past couple of years obtained the same qualification as me and is now working for the company in my old job. I want to go back for financial reasons (it's a large department so there is multiple people doing the same job), but could I work with this person again? More to the point, could she work with me?
It is all water in under the bridge as far as I'm concerned, but I suspect she is still pissed with me and will pull her old trick of stopping me getting the job if she finds out I'm applying. How do I know she's still pissed? Well, I ran into a few months back at a train station and I said "hi" and she told me to "f*ck off".
I really want my old job back. What should I do? I've toyed with the idea of trying to smooth things over with this woman first, but considering she can't even say hello without firing off expletives I cannot see how to go about it.
Any advice?
It's Your life, I highly doubt that anyone can have so much influence in a company's decision to hire a person or not. Focus on Your own goals and don't let Her get in the way of that.
Hey, this seems to be a recurring problem from what I've read, in the end it's your choice whether or not you should try to go back. Don't let her get in the way of your dreams, if she tries to stop you from getting an interview then ask for a reference from your previous boss to show that you have worked there a long time and are trustworthy. If that fails and she prevents this then you could always report her. Hope this helps!