2way griping, why am I now the griper!?

How is it considered griping when you listen to your partner griping, give feed back to let them know your listening, but when you ask a couple questions, voice your opinion of the circumstance only to be answered with subject changes which in turn upset you!? Now I gave the respect to listen to my partners griping, why wasn't same respect given? Now 2 hrs later , still in silence except for our good nights.Now I don't want to sleep In the bed, is that to much? Should I give in and let go feeling my voice was not heard? Looking for questions and opinions