Mistress in making but unprepared

I've messed up. I was being flirted with in Oct 2015 - Dec 2015 by my then next door neighbours married son. I know things are rough at home. I wanted to help. Then he cut me off. I become an object for his brother to touch. It sent me round the bend. I fell for both. However, Feb 2017 the married one reconnected with me. We spoke, and told each other how we felt. He didn't want to hurt me despite the issue. I don't make a habit of going after married men. And he chased me both times. I slept with him, I know it was stupid. But as I am aware of his situation I thought we'd help each other. He is 19 yrs older than me. We are both adults. Afterwards we spoke for a further week. Then he went quiet again. I think there could be more, but I've sent several messages to him of me ranting. I didn't want to but, I'm lost. I think I love him. Do you think if I leave it a while, and contact him (after the 3 month rule), and I've calmed down that he may speak at least? Or am I wasting my time and energy? I just want to understand why he keeps coming after me then going silent . He's 52 and I'm 33, and I'm sure we could be friends if he stopped messing with my mind. If you need more back story I can update.

This relationship never had a happy ending type of future. He is a married man who only contacted you when he desired. You need to move on and stop thinking about him. He already has a family, a future to think about. You need to go out, date others and think about your present and future.