Questioning my wife and what she wants

I have known my wife since high school and have been with four people besides her. in college we broke up because i found out she cheated on me in high school. any guy that showed her attention she would eat it up like candy. i treated her great and showed her how a guy should treat a woman. that was not enough for her as she messed around with various guys and would never admit it. when we broke up in college i had sex with two people and it was not my cup of tea. my future wife and I started dating again but something was off she only wanted me to please her and she would never please me. this went on for years and then she got pregnant and i thought things would get better but they never did. life got in the way and family responsibility required me to work while she stayed at home. we are now moving on from having kids at home to them being in school but she has not figured what she wants to do. she had started smoking weeds drinking and dressing provocative and even if it bothers me she does not care. we had a huge fight because i found out she had spent 6 hours at a guys house after buying weed. she said that she does not satisfy me enough and we should trying being swingers or get a girlfriend. i think this is her way of trying to have her cake and eating it as well. i feel that she has had this type of experience with others but now wants me to try it so she can continue with that life style. i dont know what to think as she had a profile on a dating site and feel betrayed. i know that is now a matter of time before we bring up the divorce word. she continues to do what she wants and does not care. each time we have sex i do my best to please her and have started going at it for hours but now that does not seem like its enough. i am above average in length and thickness and have found that i can go longer than most guys. this leads me to believe i can not meet her needs and she will seek out other partners believing i will not leave. i dont want to waste my time and settle for being someone second choice. i want my kids because i dont want them exposed to their mothers slut behavior and don't want to take a chance that she brings something home as she can not have any more kids. i dont know what to think..

thank you for your reply. i think that she is unhappy with me nothing that we have is enough it seems. she continues to do things that make me wonder up in the middle of the night. gets on her phone and if i wake pretends she is sleeping. i caught her in lies and i just dont think it will matter as she can lie to your face and not care about it. i asked about counseling but she does not want to talk to me. just goes over the same stuff. she has said she would take all the kids but i would never allow that. we worked on everything together so i would want my younger children with me. the teenagers are their own people and would allow her to have the freedom she wants. i just feel stupid because i have provided everything for our family. vacations every single year, new car when she does not like other one, and never questioned her about bills. i just feel tired alone and have no one to talk to because i have up friends for my family.

Omg sorry Susie but screw counseling at this point.This woman clearly has no respect for her man. It's almost like she thinks she's better.marriage goes through many changes thru the years because the people change.but her cheating has been consistent thru the years and her not trying to talk it out rings alarm bells for me. If she had been truly in love cheating would have never occurred to her, young or not. I was young and in love too i know I can't imagine how you must feel bn n a trustless marriage. As far as her not giving a crap if your happy in the bedroom I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO THINK OF THAT LOL you already have 2 children that r almost adults who will leave the nest and start their separate lives. do not stay with this girl for the 2 little ones they will be ok everyone deserves to be treated well and to find their true soul mate cuz sadly she's not it