Am I getting abused or am I just sensitive

My mom just hit me today with a bucket an broke it on me called me a bastard and other stuff. She also smashed my phone and while she was washing my hair I had a panic attack because of what she said to me and she just told me to shut up. Then she apologized to me afterwards and I feel like I'm being dramatic, I've forgiven her so much before but I don't think I can this time. It is partly my fault I've pushed her too much being rude and yelling at her but everytime I see the wounds on my hand and body I can't forgive her. I am african you know a lot of kids go through this shit and are fine with it and maybe I'm just sensitive and this is all my fault... I just need to know what other people think of this.. thx.

Well this time I don't know.. the reason she got so mad this time was because I forgot to turn off the heater and I told her to calm down when she yelled at me but then she hit me, I do think I need to be nicer to her and leave her alone but even when I tried to be level like yesterday she still hit me so I don't know what to do at this point.

Hi, It’s verbal and physical abuse. You may or may not be over sensitive and it probably does happen to other kids around you but that doesn’t make it right coz it can affect you mentally and it can be hard to forgive... Especially as you get older because you’ll be realising what’s going on. Both of you need to look at how you talk to each other and make changes for you both to have a good relationship. It’s good to know you recognise that you can wind her up or be rude to her so I would look at that and catch yourself when you’re doing it and try to stop. I understand you might be trying to defend your self. You Don’t say how old you but sounds like other consequences would work differently for you? when you do something wrong? like having your phone taken away (rather then You mum smashing it). Consequences need to fit the crime! Get another adult involved, if you can who you can trust, and talk about this with your mum. See if she will agree?