After 11 years of marriage my husband wants to practice polygamy

Before my husband and I got married and even for years after we both made it clear that we were only interested in a Monogamous union. We both agreed that we would never want to share what we have with with another party male nor female. I even asked him at one point if he ever had a threesome in his past and he said it was never something he ever wanted or was interested in trying. I know not all men have a fantasy of a threesome but some do so I was curious to know. He told me that he went to a strip club before but he didn’t see what the hype was about and was not interested in returning. We have had conversations about polygamy and my stance on it has never changed. It’s a lifestyle that just isn’t for me and I don’t like the idea of sharing my partner. It was always something we mutually agreed on. However after over a decade together my husband all of a sudden wants me to be open to the idea of practicing polygamy, having threesomes, and going to strip clubs with him. I am completely in disbelief about this. He told me that people in marriages are allowed to change their minds about things and that the wife should just mold to whatever the husband wants and support him. He thinks me having a “sister wife” would be beneficial for me and that she could also help me around the house. In reality I believe he only wants to practice that lifestyle for his own selfish reasons and it has nothing to do with me. I told him that he knew I was monogamous before we even got married and that If he wanted to be polygamous he should have entered into a relationship with someone who shares his morals. I flat out said that if he wants to live that type of lifestyle then we need to divorce and he needs to find someone else compatible with this new person he claims to be. I feel like I am in a bad dream. I understand people can change but he just completely did a whole 360 on me. If he was always like this why would he lie for this long and then flip the script on me like this. I don’t even know who he is anymore. I feel like he doesn’t care if I am miserable as long as he gets what he wants and is happy that is all that matters. I don’t have anything against anyone who wants to practice polygamy and have threesomes but you cannot lie about who you really are, get with someone who does not want to live a lifestyle like that, and then later on down the line try to force them to change to your beliefs. That is a horrible thing to do to someone. I feel sick, hurt, and very angry. I haven’t told anyone in my personal life because I just don’t have the courage to do so yet. He thinks I am overreacting and this is just a normal situation! I just wanted to get someone else’s opinion on this because he keeps trying to make me believe I am just acting crazy. I really think our marriage is over.

Okay girl.. you got two options 1. Go hit to a club and hook up with every hot guy you meet. If you wanna be even more petty, go on Instagram and DM one of your husbands close friends. Then when your husband starts tripping just say "what? I thought you wanted to have a polyamorous relationship." If you want to go above and beyond, make an Onlyfans. Cut him where it hurts and then leave. Don't stay after doing all that because it'll create a very toxic situation lol.. 2. Move in silence. Get a studio apartment, drop his ass and never speak to him again. Get a new number. Move on. Let him find out how well he does without you. You know what to do, but it's easier said than done. Right now you feel sick, disgusted, betrayed, heartbroken. Unfortunately nothing will truly get rid of that feeling but time. Take care of yourself in the meantime, if you need to cry to sad music then go ahead and do that. But don't be loathing the situation for any longer than a month, after that you need to force yourself to move past it.

Flippin' Hell! I agree totally with NAV. Talk about "Call Advertising Standards, I've been diddled!"^? You obviously sensed something, deep down. Why else would you enquire and point out you're not into threesomes? Why would it even occur to you, otherwise? And blah-blah Gaslighting-blah (on his part). This is a (seeming) case of, Invasion Of The Body Snatchers. 'Who ARE you and what have you done with my husband?!'. Hid him, that's what. This is a case of a Covert, Malignant Narcissistic so-called husband. They're the ones who can keep their repulsives arse under-wraps for that long before 'coming out' and letting it all hang out (with this sort of debachery, usually). They're likened to malignant Psychopaths in that regard...the double life and 'airtight' "Mask of Sanity (or Respectability)". They wait and wait and wait...until you're REALLY hooked so that doing whatever it is they're trying to coerce you into doing seems less daunting than the hurt and devastation of daring to end the relationship. Have you surfed about Covert Malignants yet? If not - DO. You are correct. You DON'T know him. Because the him you fell in-love with and built a (you thought) relationship with does not exist...he's a character...a 24/7 actor behind whatever "personality" he could tell would light your candle. Of course you know what to do, yes. But you'll have to get used to the idea before you can act. It is a brain-f**k of gargantuan proportions and no messing.....makes you feel as if your life with "him" has been one, long lie...which it has. Long Con merchant. I also agree you need to act fast and get in there fast with a solicitor. This is the type that will hide money from the settlement pot - if you give them time. AND DO NOT TELL HIM YOU'RE SEEING A SOLICITOR. Time to act back (and better). "Nothing wrong here, biz as normal (albeit I'm pissed-off with you)...tum-tee-tum". Nav obviously's walked in your shoes. So have I. LOADS of visitors here now and in the past have. Check out the archived posts, searching by Relationship or Emotional. You okay? Need to talk to us (and call him all the names under the sun)? I know I do. And I wasn't even married to him. (The Bsstd) (and Pervert). Ugh. Tantamount to pooing on a church alter, that is. PS: make sure he's not snooping in your gadgets; delete this site from your History each time. They're not called Covert for nothing. (Nice one, Nav!)

Here you go, LL: https://www.peoplesproblems.org/showtopic/13463/How-to-deal-with-wifes-infidelity-which-she-denies M393. Lovely chap. Married to the female version of your (PFFFFFFF!) husband. You two are same type co-victims and should talk...you'll both find it enormously comforting and validating,,,..go say hi to him and paste in the link to this, your thread? Or I can introduce you if you're shy?