Tough start to Uni

Hello everyone, lately I have been having some trouble figuring some things out and thought perhaps someone here could spare a moment's advice. Hope this is ok to post here. So first some context, I just started Uni last October. Moved countries, learnt the language (struggled in the beginning but language barrier has gotten better) all while being rather young, 17. Leaving family behind was not so difficult. I definitely think that I am colder and more detached than most people, it's just the way I am. Socially, I definitely would say I have made progress since secondary school. I am more open, less hesitant to talk and quicker to confide in the people I trust. But, I still don't really have many friends I spend quite a lot of my time alone and don't really have a "group". I am grateful for the friends that I do have, we get along well but I still kind of feel like the outsider here. Sorry if the thread doesn't fit the forum. Otherwise if someone does have advice I would be really quite grateful to here it. Thanks for reading, have a nice day!

Hi Adviceseeker, I wanted to say it's impressive that you've managed to learn a second language and move countries, AND go to a University there. Before the age of 18, I might add. You definitely have some great motivation and have taken the time to set yourself up for success with the right tools, it seems. So I can relate to being an outsider, but among my peers where I grew up. I had friends over the years, but our time being friends had a really distinct beginning and end. The two remaining friends I do have both live far away from me, and only one of them stays in touch regularly these days. A problem for me, I've noticed, is that a lot of places are incredibly insular. A city I moved a few hours away to from my hometown was a great place to live, and it helped me grow a lot as a person. ...But the people there were kind of lousy friends. They all hung out with friends they already had from high school, or family members, and any new people they met along the way were more like casual acquaintances to them than anything else. The thing is, I'm still not sure what you do if you find yourself amongst a population of generally insular and closed-off people. Even when you think you're becoming good friends, to them you're just sort of replaceable. You're another new face amidst a sea of countless others who enter their lives for a time, until you're replaced by something else. And I don't say this to be a downer, but it is a real issue. It seems to happen a lot in places where people are kind of well-off, and have lots of choices. (Though, I'm sure it can happen just as much in an unwelcoming hick town.) Usually you can still meet people who are more outgoing and who are putting in the effort to meet people, if you put in enough of your own effort to meet them. Fortunately, attending a University, I am sure they offer different clubs and groups that you could try to join to meet people. Or, at least, I'm sure there would be regularly-scheduled events or sports games going on from time to time. For meeting people your age, with a similar drive, that is probably one of your best tools at your disposal is the resources that your Uni offers. Meeting people in public can be a lot harder. If you want to meet people who are a little older, or, who are younger once you become older, then you will have to navigate that world. If the country you've moved to has any great museums or parks or local events going on, and they also sound appealing to you, then it might just be worth checking those out. You may or may not meet people there, but at least you could have a good time and get to be around the locals a little. Maybe you can convince some of those friends you do have to go to places like that with you as well. Your thread fits the forum perfectly fine! Feel free to continue discussing anything you want feedback on or need to get off of your chest here. The regular posters will try to respond whenever they can. I hope your school year has been going well!

Congratulations on the whole relocation thing Re: I still don't really have many friends I spend quite a lot of my time alone and don't really have a "group" > The way to have a "group", is to have an interest. The interest is, a common interest like with a team, club ... Book club, sports team ... You get the idea