Back with ex

I met the women I married when I was nineteen. I was young and blinded by love the momentum I met her. At the time I thought I could be her night in shining armor. She was going threw a separation/divorce, two kids, and a crazy ex. I loved her and any and everything I could do to support her and her kids I would do. It was hard to be with this women because every time we argued she ran. And over the years my resentments and alcohol consumption rose. Things did get better over time. We married in 2003 and I went over seas. When I returned my resentments got the best of me with a long dose of Iraq. For the next six to seven years my life was a roller coaster ride filled with alcohol and per miscues behavior from me. I know this sounds dysfunctional, it's was. But some where in all the dysfunctional we were in love with each other. Ok, over the years I drank and cumulated enough DUIs to put me in prison. She left me for her first love. While in prison I did everything anything I could to better me. Today, I am and have been sober for four years. Now, on the other hand her three years was a so called nightmare for herself and our kids. I know today everything I do I play a part in, which leads me to this. My third day out I go see all my kids and wouldn't you know she found her way to me. Ill admit I wanted to save her, knowing I couldn't. God this is long. We were off and running. I got a job a place and we moved in together. It was a nightmare of lies and deceit. I couldn't understand it. Here we were together and she plays the my first love card. I know I did it to my self but she wanted to commit. She continued to text and even ended up staying a night with him. I again thinking I could be strong enough got threw it and we got help and therapy. Three months later he still try's to get at her and she has blocked him from everything. Believe me people I know this is my fault. She assures me we will be together forever but the truth is I don't trust her. And I'm sure u can see why. I believe people can make it threw issues like these. The reason I'm writing is to see what other people would say or do about this. I have an open mind about all this and am willing to hear your feed back and respond. I don't know how this works but if there is any more information I need to submit I will. Thank you.