Time running out...

Time is running out. It's all going to come crashing down in about a year from now. Been a single parent for 11 yrs now. Haven't wanted to meet anyone as I wanted to be a full time parent. I struggled having a boyfriend & being mum so I chose my kids. And have been fine with that. Children both leave school next year, they are great kids, don't give me any trouble. We are very close, but they will be doing apprenticeships next year. So no income, or not enough to pay rent out of anyway. I don't know how I am going to afford to feed us all. I haven't mentioned this to them, their future is important & they shouldn't have the worry anyway. I am self employed working from home at the moment, luckily managed to find an art I am good at & have turned it into an income (him up there was looking out for me I think) as we don't live near the school, so I have to run a car & drive the kids to & from school, sometimes 4 times a day as son is in 6th for & does odd hours so being self employed fits in around them well, but yes, I am doing a job I love but it only works because I claim working/parent tax credits top up, that drops right down next year once the teens leave further education & I will only be able to claim a single persons working tax credits, CSA from their father & child benefit go out the window obviously. I'm starting to panic & just feel like I will either have to win the lottery or catch the bus (end it) I thought I had done so well the last 11 years. But I know now deep down that was only because the government propped me up. Please tell me how other single parents dropped so much income suddenly & got on ok. At the moment I don't see a way, apart from finding a full time job quickly the moment they both leave school, & in this climate that's easier said than done? And with my skills, I know I wont earn enough to support 3 of us? Their dad wont be of any use by the way as he is always pleading poverty & can't wait for the moment he stops having to pay CSA, although he does have regular contact with them, which is the main thing. Any advice would be gratefully received. As I keep going through moments of thinking how easy it would be to just take some pills & the worry will go away, or tell me I am being ridiculous & to get a grip. If that's how it is, Maybe I need a wake up call...

Hi, sounds like just life. Don't let it get to you as it's just a stage to get past :) As for the finances, check your local council for community supporrt services, they may be able to point you in direction of someone to help. As for the relationship, allow you to have one, try not to let the kids be the reason you have no-one. You need it for yourself too. Life is hard and I'm sure there is someone you know who can stand beside you through it :)