My partner is seperated

my partner is seperated and has been for over a year now. They are getting divorced but it is taking so long. She only him to see her son once very 2 weeks for 3 hours on a sunday. everything he buys for him she throws away. she wouldn't tell him who is birthday present was from, has accused him of child abuse, assulted him in front of his son and damaged all his belongings. We now have a son 3 months old and she thinks that he has traded his other son in. Last time he had him she followed him to the shops and in the end joined them by holding her hand. she also let him drive up from portsmouth to hull at christmas to see him and she wouldn't let him see his son. I have been forbidden from seeing his son because she said i wasn't allowed. she has not seeked legal advice since june regarding the divorce. Every time he goes up i don't know whats going to happen, its getting me down. What can we do its really getting me down as well as him?