I confessed my love for him but he is not giving me direct answers

My age is 22(female) and I am in love with a guy of age 26. I totally love him but when I confessed him he said he does not believe in love anymore due to his past experience with his girlfriend. He ignored me in every best possible way. I have been doing one sided communication for last 5 months by sending him texts and calling him. I hardly hear anything from him. Every time I text him that this would be my last text he responds me back texting something which gives me a ray of hope. 2 days before I called him and said why is he doing this to me. Its so painful waiting for someone about whose feelings you are unsure about. He told me that he has not got over his last relationship which ended 4 years back.I felt sorry for him and asked but why is he putting me in dilemma. If he can't love me just say upfront that he does not love me and I would move on. For that he said I don't want you to move on. I want you to be with me. We can talk, we can be friends. I don't know what should I do. I love him but he never expresses his feelings for me. At the same time he does not want to lose me too.It really hurts waiting for the call of his whole day, whole night and still not getting any call. We are far apart. I miss him every day. Please suggest me what to do. Shall I wait for him thinking that he would forget his last experience and would express his feelings one day to me or move on? I am really struck in between my own emotions. Please help me what should I do.

It is a long distance relationship. We used to work together in a same company.I got transferred later now he is at a different place and I am at a different place. I am more then 1000 kilometers away from him but we talk on phone sometimes.

I think I know how you feel, when you say your far apart. Its not so much actuall miles as it so much feels like it. I. know how much it hurts when love is so one sided. And just when you think your ready to walk away they tell you something to keep you there. My suggestion is this, don't tell him, but set a time limit a week a month how ever long you think your willing to wait for him. And if he doesn't respond back to your feelings and your confession to him about loving him then you might have to consider moving on other wise you will end up alone waiting for something that's probabley never going to happen. And maybe even letting a chance to meet someone who could love you pass you by.

Thank you. I was really feeling terrible. Today he called me himself which seemed to be an improvement in our relationship.Even though the conversation lasted for just 3 minutes but this was the first time he called himself.It was a formal conversation but I was bit relieved. You are right. I would wait for him for another one month. If nothing changes and nothing seems positive I would move on. Because his silence is eating me up now.

Hey Swana, Hope you are well. I read this post and wanted to reach out to you. You are so young and filled with life my dear! If you are in an exclusive relationship with someone, they will make time for you no matter the distance. Honestly, I can suggest that you move on. Start dating nice men that put in the same effort that you put in. They do exist. His relationship issues do not belong to you so the fact that he cannot get over his last relationship is his issue, not yours. You want someone that will make you a priority my dear. You deserve the BEST! :) Focus on yourself. Good Luck Email me if you need any guidance [e-mail address removed] -Life Coach

When someone leaves someone hanging and waiting it stops that person from finding true love. I agree wholeheartedly with ASTUNNINGME. Good luck!!

Start dating other people and let him know. If he changes and makes you his priority fine, else move on. He might only want you as a friend.

For last 3-4 days he had been calling me and we talked for 2 hours everyday on the phone but he talks most of the time about his ex-girlfriend. One day he was drunk and he said sometimes I feel I am falling in love with you Swana. Just realizing what he said he said I am talking too much today and hung up the call. We had been talking for two hours everyday. I thought everything is changing but then today when I did not get any call. I called him and he said he won't talk to me. His mood swings are unpredictable. It aches when he does all of this. This relationship is completely going on his terms and conditions.Is it the time to move on now?

you quoted: "he does not believe in love anymore due to his past experience with his girlfriend." for starters for someone to not believe in love, its a task that you'll need to do to show him how to love again... Don't pressure him for an answer to how he feels about you, he's told you so far that he doesn't want you to leave. If you are patient & wanting to make it work it takes baby steps for someone in his position to put his guard down, you have to understand that what he went through he does not want to go through ever again & that it's not simple to what you think it is. As frustrating as it may seem, keep doing what your doing which is communicating with him. Express how you miss him & try to spend time with him. The whole purpose of breaking the ice is to remind him of how fun a relationship can be & show him the fun side of you & give him a reason to why your different by showing him that you are not his ex and not all girls are like that. If you want to make it work you will make it work, giving up on him will just prove to him that all girls are just a disappointment to his life & you said it yourself that you love this guy. Yes you feel your the only one thats pulling the weight for the both of yous, what do you expect? he doesnt want to invest in another relationship that will give him another heart ache. It's not his fault, but the more you keep showing him how to love the more ices he breaks & a step closer he will feel towards you.

my point is don't give up on him, hes broken one ice to say he don't want you to leave. what you were doing before must be working for you to get that much info out. least you know how much he feels so far.. & for him to tell you he don't want you to leave, doesn't that tell you alot of info with him just using a few words???? I hope all is well & goodluck

Yeah I think you are right LIPZSEALED .... I can't leave him alone in this. I love him sicerely. He need's me I know but sometimes I get hurt when he gets rude with me by avoiding me or saying certain things. Even I am a human being. I am trying to help him come out of this. He should think about my feelings too sometimes. Whenever he gets rude with me I start losing hope. But you are right I will stay by him in this. May be one day he will be mine...