hello, I am 43 I had a short relationship with a 29 year man. he really liked me I was unsure I said lets just do the sex thing but that was hard for me I should have known better one night he came over he was drinking lots and wanted to drive I told him no way I got really really mad and he left and drove away I never heard from him again. on January 31 I found out I was pregnant I texted him said I was pregnant and having abortion never heard from him after speaking with my doctor and family I decided to have this baby so I texted him that. he changed his number the next day have never heard from him again. when we were together he really opened up to me and I never thought he could be such a coward to just not respond to my pregnancy and change his number. what should I do, will he ever contact me I need serious advise. thank you
I am really sorry to say. But I don't think he will reply. The only thing you can do now is to carry on with your life, and try to forget about him. As hard as it may be.
I hope you and your baby have a great life.
Dear HeartSickJ, forget about this guy and focus on your own happiness. Stop texting him, he doesn't deserve any more of your attention at this time... and maybe never. Most likely he is in a bit of a shock at the news. The difference between a man and a boy is how he chooses to react to such a big news. You got your answer. If he is under the impression that you had an abortion, he is likely to never surface again. If he is at all curious about a possible change of heart on your part, he may eventually show up again... it may take years, because most likely he needs to grow up himself! So, don't count on him to father this child. Drop all your expectations of this guy. Do it for yourself and your baby. It may be a blessing that he is not around, because having no father in one's life is certainly not any worse than having a worthless father.
You are about to turn a big chapter page in your life. You have an amazing little person growing inside of you. I am a mom too and I know what a hormonal and emotional soup we turn into when we are pregnant. It is hard enough with a supportive partner by your side. It must be so painful for you to feel rejected and alone during this time. I am sure at times it seems impossible and unbearable... Believe me when I say YOU CAN DO THIS! You are not alone! Please see the magic in this time and focus on this magic. You are special and this little angel inside of you chose you for a mommy! I can tell you from my own personal experience (I have two kids) that there is nothing like motherhood that opens your heart and lets you feel the sheer joy of being in this world! Well, nothing teaches you patience better either.
Your unborn child and you are connected in more than just a physical way at this time. Your emotional health is very important. When you are stressed, worried, scared, or depressed your body releases certain hormones and these hormones do affect your baby. So, try to relax as much as you can and focus on welcoming a very special little person into your life. While this is a painful time for you emotionally, this is also a very special time for you too. Try your best to see the joy in it and you will be so glad you did.
Do you have family? Good friends? A network of support? That is important and you will need these people in your life now and when you give birth. The best, most valuable thing you can do for yourself and your baby at this time is to stay calm, to rest, and to do something that evokes the feeling of gratitude within in you every day. You may find comfort in watching movies. There are lots of great movies out there with a strong female lead role who goes through similar experience as yours. Draw strength from these stories. Ask your healthcare provider for sources of support. If you live in a place where midwifery is common, definitely look into getting to know a well respected, experienced midwife. They are a wealth of information, wisdom, medical knowledge and support!
Sending you love and light on your journey. Much happiness to you and your wee one!
Sorry to hear what you're going through.
I agree with what the others have said, namely forget about him and focus on you and your unborn child. If he has a change of heart (unlikely but not impossible) he knows where to find you.
Take care of yourself