I cant figure out who i am. i cant even figure out my problem.

this is my first time asking for help, because ive been scared about what id get told and i think i rushed my decision way too soon. For a long time i thought i was gay, im an 18 year old guy, when i was hiding the gay side of me i had a girlfriend like most people do, and i eventually came out. ive had relationships with guys ever since because thats who i thought i was, but now ive fallen completely in love with a guy who is perfect, nothings ever gonna happen and ive kind of accepted that becaus ive had to, but ive done nothing but think about him for a long time, but over the last few months its been different, because im not thinking about him, im thinking about what i liked about him, and i dont see me settling down with a guy, i dont want to, i feel like i should be falling in love with a girl, i think its more normal, its more natural and ive started picturing myself with people from my college, and it looks nice, theyre all girls and i just think that the more i thik about it... i never fell in love with the guy, it was the way he was and it has completely messed with my head. i know i want kids, i kow i want a family. but i just dont know who i am anymore, i dont know if i am gay or straight or bi or what, i want to be with a girl, but ive only ever fell in love with this guy, and i cant have him, so i dont know what it is that i want :( if you follow this you deserve a medal D:

There's someone out there for everyone. One day, believe me, you'll find someone who is an addition to you. Don't try to find someone who completes you, be happy with who you are and don't care about what anyone thinks. When you learn to accept what you want and who you are, that's when you'll be happy.