Help - my husband is suicidal

My husband has been suicidal recently.. He quit the fire department months back cause they were mistreating him, recently friends of his wanted him to come back to the department, but they declined him.. now he feels useless, depressed, to the point he is suicidal.. its scaring me and making me mad in a way cause we have a 18 month old son and its like we dont make any difference to him.. he says half his life is gone cause of it he misses helping people.. which i understand it meant a lot to him! but what about our son and I? dont we mean alot too enough for him to be less depression, and not suicidal.. i feel like we arent enough for him to feel needed, or enough for him to be happy.. he makes me feels like complete crap and it hurts me so much to hear and deal with all this.. I have depression issues myself, i stress easily, anxiety, and i also have heart problems.. i feel like i cant do anything to help or to even make him feel better.. he says the pain is to much. i dont know what to do anymore..

You say, "now he feels useless, depressed, to the point he is suicidal" You are very wise to reach out for hlep. And you add: "its scaring me and making me mad in a way cause we have a 18 month old son and its like we dont make any difference to him." You then say, "he says half his life is gone cause of it he misses helping people" He sounds like a good guy. One, you may want to get him to a psychiatrist to see if anti-depressants might help. They did me. Depression is treatable. The possibility of suicide is very serious, so you don't want to just mentioned this to him once and then drop it. When he's depressed, he won't be making good decisions. So, you'll have to think for him, as you do for your child. One thing is, you could look up then name of such a doctor on yellow pages of your computer. Under search engine, type in: psychiatrist for your hometown. Choose one, male or female as you choose. Call and make an appointment. You go to meeting if your husband won't. Talk to the psy. about what's going on. Get their advice, ask. Tell your husband, the next appointment is in 2 weeks, and this time you're going, or you're in big trouble with me. (If you can't afford a private psychiatrist, look up on search engine "psychological clinics" or "mental health clinics" or "medical or treatment clinics" for your hometown; call one or two of them and see what they say. They charge on a sliding scale, depending on your salary.) Also, when you're depressed, you don't think there is anything that can help. There is. Anti-depressants. Also, I've been depressed many times for many years (I'm manic-depressive), but I've never thought of suicide even once. So, if he's talking suicide, he's in bad shape. So you have to man up. You tell him what you told us: "I'm hacked off. You're re only thinking about yourself, and not thinking about me or our child." "So, we're going to get you ass to the doctor. No buts about it. " Then make the appointment, and kick his ass to both of you go there. You go yourself to show him up if he won't go to the appt. If he's a nice guy, suggest volunteer work helping people. It will help him, also. Look up on net for your hometown, "jobs," and see what is available. With you on his side, I've got a hunch he's going to do OK. But you've got to kick his ass. You're gonna have to do some things for him: psychiatrist, job search, volunteer work, because, like I say, he's like a child, and you're going to have to do his thinking for him.

NO, NO NO, NO, NO..... DO NOT SAY to him you are angry and that you feel like you and your son don't matter to him!!!! Please do not do that. That will only cause him guilt and push him further into the clutches of his depression. Yes, DO suggest professional help. Explain that you love him and that you just want him to get better, and that it hurts you to see him like this. If he does refuse help, then put your foot down and make an appointment for him and make sure he shows up. Other than that i agree with volunteer work/job search