Total misfit

Im a man of 48 and feel a complete misfit. I just feel people have always ignored me(except when they want a scapegoat). I live alone and my only contact with the outside world is through my computer. I just dont fit in socially anywhere, I dont drink or smoke and I find the social scene as it is too hard bitten, competitive and rough. Ive tried friendship websites but they havent produced much only disappointment. I feel ignored by people because I am poor, my face doesnt fit, dont have holidays or posessions that people are interested in these days. U cant flash money around either and Im not prepared to get into debt to impress people. I just feel by best efforts are ignored by everyone. I am so depressed(I am on medication for it). I do not feel like doing anything because there is no reward(I dont just mean money). I was agifted child but suffered bullying at school ftom 5-16. I detest teenagers now because of my experiences, they always laugh at humiliating people. The gifts I had (mainly with words and figures) were ignored and trashed by people and I feel ive never been encouraged. Please dont suggest I help out in classes - Im not in the mood and it will take a complete reversa for the better in my fortunes before I ever will be. I have tried education and voluntary work but Ive never got anywhere with it socially or otherwise. I just feel nothing will ever get better for me. P>S Please dont suggest religion I have no faith and I cant stand the rituals.

Hi Paul Please dont give up easily i mean we are human rigth plus we all have diferent experience in our childhood. Past is the past, forget about it.. move on to the future is you kno what i mean.. If your worried about meeting your perfect woman you dont have to impress them with gift's and money...all we care about is the PERSONALITY. GOOD LUCK