"Talking" to an adult online

I didn't know if i should've put this in category "Legal" or "Sex", but i put it in "Legal" since i have not actually had sex with the guy I'm about to talk about. I have my age in my username and he has talked about my age, so he knows I'm 13. He says I'm not allowed to save chats, so when i say "he said", "i replied with", ETC I'm not saying EXACTLY what the said chat said, but what i remember of the chat. though i think i have to put a warning for pedophilia(?) and sexual content. And i also want to apologize for any spelling mistakes, I'm not English, but im trying my best. So i met this guy on snapchat, he added me, and I was curious so i accepted, i know i probably should not accept a strangers friend request, but it's too late to undo. He started the conversation with something along the lines of "Hi. How can i help you?" Which at first i was confused by since HE added me first, but ignored it. I replied with "Well you added me, so do YOU want something?" He said "Well, belive it or not... But i like to get to know people before I go all Sugar Daddy😏" I was nervous but inteerested, i think my mind first went to "Maybe he'll buy me pretty clothes?" Which is my fault. But we talked for a while and sent each other selfies, he didn't look old, OLD, but he was obviously an adult, he said "What's your bodycount?" i just replied with "I've never had sex." he said "I assumed so." That was the first more spicy text. I don't remember if it was the first night after i met him or the second night, but we sent each other nudes. He told me he was 26. There's not much too say. He's said a lot of inappropriate stuff and i played into it. He said he wanted to have sex with me, impragnate me, hold me and that it's okay because where he lives girls loose their virginity at 10, and that he lost his virginity when he was around my age, he's randomly traumadumped. But there's so much that's my fault, i like the attention, i play into it and sometimes act sedductive, I've been thinking about it and there's so much that I did, i never denied him, but there's a small voice in the back of my head tellig me that it's not my fault and that it's his fault because he's an adult, that voice caused me to post this, but i still feel as if its my fault. I'd like some advice about what to do.

Thanks for your patience! Someone will respond soon, or I myself if it comes to that. It's only ever a case of By When, not If. Meanwhile, feel free to read the opening posts of the other (at the mo.) two visitors-in-waiting, and give your thoughts, invite them over to yours - or just say a sympathetic Hi. Don't be shy. :) Same message to all of you, btw....Aside from, in your case: this "I have my age in my username and he has talked about my age, so he knows I'm 13. He says I'm not allowed to save chats" I haven't read further than yet as I prefer to walk step-by-step in your shoes through your experience, but - that jumped out at me and had me SHOUTING at the monitor: "Red Flag, Red Flag - RUN!". (Sorry if that proves to be a Spoiler (heh).)

Hey again! So.... He says YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED to save your chats? Sorry - not WHAT? Allowed? Sorry - what? ALLOWED?!?!! Oh yeah? "Or else" WHAT? What's he going to do about it - stop your pocket-money? Courtmartial you?! Or withhold affection (oh, goodie - Gals Night Out whilst baby boy-fiend in a man-suit's busy having yet another stone-cold tantrum!). Until you lose your joie de vivre and never go out again (because it's easier than constantly arguing and defending your rights). Talk about Coercive Control....talk about desperate to be in the HUGELY 'Superior' and Dominant position and having the temerity and arrogance to boss you around like that. Ooooh, get him - the Big I Am, picking on someone...how much less his age? Haven't started reading yet, since spotting that low-down, dirty command of his. But - I know you're not FIVE?! So who does he think he's talking to? Does he think Thirteen equals Thick, maybe? What are the future commands going to be? ..."Sit!.....STAY!.....Roll-over!"? It's patently obvious why the warning not to save the chats: (1) No written record as evidence (he doesn't know about here ;)), (2) because he's a bully-predator including sexual-predator who likes 'easy', 'defenceless' prey that'll fall in-line and do whatever he (constantly) tells her so's not to lose him (like he constantly implies she/he could). ...Or so he hoped. (Bugs-Bunny voice:) "Nyyyyyeeeeah (chomp-chomp-chomp!).....He djon't knyow me - or dee udder GenZs - too wew, do he!". He coitenly don't. And -Well done you for spotting that and whatever else Red flags. Talk about Switched-On for (what USED to be 'only') Thirteen, but, in terms of savvy-ness, emotional intelligence and all tooled-up (with knowledge, which is power) - more like 20. All that recent suffering made you all go through a growth and development spurt, too. You guys 'know too much' and can be squishy when warranted or fierce and super-assertive when warranted ("I ain't 'avin it - I know my rights!"...love it). I mean, what kind of male can't feel remotely manly and powerful up against a woman his own age (or fears them and, e.g., calls them Girls) and has to pick on a (compared to him) child? Saying that, I don't know the age-gap yet so, right then...gas-mask on and in I go... Afore I forget though: START SCREENSHOTTING THEM (and, up his bum!) (although he'd probably like that, it'd be like 'coming home'). "I didn't know if i should've put this in category "Legal" or "Sex", but i put it in "Legal" since i have not actually had sex with the guy I'm about to talk about." It's both. It's firstly about Priming someone to let them have total power and control over them, to point of, eventually dictating and controlling every aspect of their life ("Here, Slave!"), and when that tack fails, emotionally abusing and blackmailing them, whilst abusing you physically and spiritually by tricking your virginity and self-worth out of you (just for his pleasure and pervy tittillation). The collective drip-drip trauma would do real damage to your still-developing brain (which can teach itself under your radar) and then you'd have a second whammy once you had a kid and she hit your age now. You'd look at her and feel that love and protectiveness (which healthy adults automatically extend to EVERYONE'S kids) and only then have the full-force, the enormity of it, hit you....."How could he! How could ANYONE who wasn't seriously sick in the head! He was a monster!". "I have my age in my username and he has talked about my age, so he knows I'm 13. He says I'm not allowed to save chats, so when i say "he said", "i replied with", ETC I'm not saying EXACTLY what the said chat said, but what i remember of the chat. though i think i have to put a warning for pedophilia(?) and sexual content. And i also want to apologize for any spelling mistakes, I'm not English, but im trying my best." Repeat: start screen-shotting and using this thread as your Diary/record of events. "So i met this guy on snapchat, he added me, and I was curious so i accepted," Curious. What - because you could tell you had 'a live one' within your observational/analytical reach? Yep. Morbid Curiosity/Cascination. It's a huge puller, and keeper in the game, that one ("I am studyink dis specimen, do nodt interrupt me, I am genius at verk"). It has a direct association with intelligence, does strong curiosity. That's as well as may be. However, you do need to be tooled-up in order, once you're done, to escape from your Lab, unscathed, and stay very observant and aware in the meantime so that you can't be wrong-footed. IDEALLY, it's best just to ghost and block him, and the sooner the better...get the rest at zero risk off the web. It all very quickly becomes the Cycle Of Abuse (google) on fast-cycle, anyway (spin cycle, sometimes) so it and he (It) loses it's novelty and mystery very quickly. Basically, you're being chatted-up by Chucky...who's now an adult...physically only. "i know i probably should not accept a strangers friend request, but it's too late to undo." As above. But I doubt very much it's too late to extricate yourself cleanly and cleverely...with help and support, obvs. You know what YOU'RE bringing to my mind? The (incredible) film, Hard Candy, starring Ellen wotserface who previously starred in Juno (fab actress). If you haven't seen it - do. *You*....MUST. You'll LOVE it! But that's veering a little too far from the real world and, what to do about this very sick, pathetic, cowardly, weasley, BULLY. "He started the conversation with something along the lines of "Hi. How can i help you?" Which at first i was confused by since HE added me first, but ignored it." Oh, PUKE. Noted you didn't panic and just chose to rise above it. Well done. I know a video clip like that...sums it up for you (hysterically funny too): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2hM97kEKGME "I replied with "Well you added me, so do YOU want something?"" OMG, YOU LOT ARE TOO BRILLIANT! From a 13-year-old going on 43, OMG! Back in my day, women didn't get that sassy until they hit about 24-26. I'm surprised HE didn't lose his place at that point, haha! "He said "Well, belive it or not... But i like to get to know people before I go all Sugar Daddy😏"" HUH? How does THAT follow! How did he get from YOU asking what HE wants, to him telling you what (he presumes) YOU want? That's like this: Would you like two sugars in your tea? / Yes, and folded with the crusts cut off. Talk about jarring. He's not polished AT ALL, is he. "I was nervous but inteerested," Yeah - there it is, haha. (I know a younger Me too well, hahahahaha!) "i think my mind first went to "Maybe he'll buy me pretty clothes?" Which is my fault." How's it your fault when he deliberately planted that whole idea? Of course you're going to 'go there'; it's just a logical reflex. I'd have said, 'If you're a Sugar Daddy then does that mean if I leave you out in the rain, you'll melt to nothing?', and if he'd said, No, I'd have said - 'Shame...'. I'm trying to think if I got picked-on at Thirteen. Let me think.... I know when I was 15 I had a dinosaur of a 35-year-old after me (taxi driver at my home train station). Even back then and regardless that I was precociousy advanced, I remember thinking, 'What on earth would a nearly-middle-aged man want with a 15 year old?'. What helped enormously was the fact he had a moustache (ugh!) and a faint air of 70s Throwback (they can't change which includes update, themselves nor when it comes to adapting with the times and societal progress/enlightenment). "But we talked for a while and sent each other selfies, he didn't look old, OLD, but he was obviously an adult," Not OLD old. Like going OUT out, haha. So old but not dead yet, yeh? Did you get the urge to call him Dad or Grandad? Tell him, if he's going to act half the time like he's either, then he can pay you pocket-money, Birthday and Xmas pressies/money. Back-dated. Otherwise, shut the uck up, Old Weirdo because with GenZ's - obedience and compliance costs. :p I'm only joshing. Say nothing of the kind. Just keep thinking it to yourself. "he said "What's your bodycount?" i just replied with "I've never had sex." he said "I assumed so." That was the first more spicy text." BODYCOUNT? That used to mean slaughtered people/soldiers! I'd have replied, 'Dunno for-sure because a couple managed to get loose and escape'. In fact, why don't you have fun and do that - go all bizarre-like psycho on him? Eh? Eh? Malignant Psychos trump Malignant Narcs ANY day. That'd blow his mind, wouldn't it - a GenZ 'we don't mess around' psycho on his scent, ready to do 'an Ellen' (you MUST watch it! NOW. Right now.). What fun! "I don't remember if it was the first night after i met him or the second night, but we sent each other nudes." Oh dear. "He told me he was 26." Twice your age. He may only be 26 himself, but - imagine what any of us would think if a same-aged friend of ours seemed intent on hanging-out even just platonically with someone half their age? (O-kayyyy....lil bit weird, abnormal and revealing to say the least, *shuffle-shuffle*). So, if it were you - being besties with 6-and-a-half-year-olds. Yeah? Now throw wanting to have sex (and texting) in the mix. Being able to get turned-on in the first place, no awkwardness, shame, embarrassment AT ALL. Quite the opposite: r*ndy as hell. And who cares who YOU - his intended d*ldo - feel about it! He's not interested in what you think or feel. If he were, someone his age would, despite his sick urges, be deliberately staying well away from you (see how that works?). He should be sectioned. He is definitely acting exactly like a long-con, Narcissistic (the Word Salad up there) predator, specifically, a Paedophile on the prowl and prime. Only - whoops! - he's mis-picked an adult in a kid suit ("HAH-hah!"). (He'll be too low eQ-ed to appreciate the meaning behind your behaviour and sass, you see.) But anyway... So we know he's 13 or 14 himself, then. Maybe 15 at a push. And cold-hearted and sadistic with it. "There's not much too say. He's said a lot of inappropriate stuff and i played into it." Yeah, as you saw, I could tell that right from the get go, that you were playing him. "He said he wanted to have sex with me, impragnate me, hold me and that it's okay because where he lives girls loose their virginity at 10," Where is he - Deep South, US of A? And - what Century? Does he have a household of Black-slave staff as well? 'Girls'... GIRLS, note. You're not, you're a young woman. Girlhood stops at 12. He's subliminally downgrading you, trying to make you feel smaller (so he can feel bigger/older than you), ALREADY, look. Another fun idea: Tell him you have a confession (and hope it won't change anything) (smirk)...that you're actually 65 but with a rare genetic disorder as makes you remain lifelong outside like a 13-year-old. And then, having MADE that confession (assuming he failed to just ghost you), you started getting really clucky, critical and bossy with him... Now THAT would be hysterical! And believe you me, if he's a Narc-Spath - they have lied so much that the mechanism from telling lie from truth, fantasy from reality, gets broken...which makes them swallow and act according to your BS even when they heavily suspect that BS is what it is. Plus, despite they vowed to immovably be Master on leaving home/their abuser (assuming they're not spinning you a childhood abuse yarn) - being Slave is their childhood comfort zone. It's EQUAL they can't stand, feel terrible in. Haven't got a CLUE how. Women his own age would make short shrift of him. Like Olivia Rodriguez's lyrics: ...went for me and not her....Cos girls your age know better. Yup. Because they've met his type before AND/OR have managed to get a few perfectly nice relationships under their belt. "and that he lost his virginity when he was around my age, he's randomly traumadumped." Okay. Narc-Spath it is. Figures. No Shame, pathetically too little Conscience (sick ego urges too strong for that or commonsense), sadistic, HIGHLY manipulative (think magician...sleight of hand while distracting or forcing your focus).... Twisted Fire-Starter, basically. All about Power Over, being envied and admired, slightly thuggish (which is 'very', suppressed but bursting out a bit at the seams), money-money-money, novelty-novelty-novelty, things-things-things, .....but too bored with it all so taking greater and greater risks. Plus INCAPABLE of any equality/equity. It's Master (him) - Servant (you) - his way or the highway - and although they know they can't MAKE you do X, they can sure as hell make you wish you had. Their Narc Rages/Tantrums (once they feel safe and cocky enough) are like something out of a cheap daytime soap melodrama or B horror movie...but not funny when you're in the same room as it. And what makes them worse is, their (still faked, but convincing) good side. Too good to leave/too bad to stay. *So get out - or stubbornly MAINTAIN that safely out-of-range distance - before you find yourself hooked even against your own will and awareness*. It happens. Too much. They have a weird and entrancing (yes, fascinating) effect on us normal-healthy empaths. You end up unable to make a decision or move a muscle either way. They're the biggest, heaviest, freakiest Narc of all (at least a cool-cucumber psycho can be reasoned and negotiated with; hot-headed (as well as cold) NSpaths - nuh-uh, their Narc Rages/tantrums are downright unbelievable, unreal and highly traumatising if you've developed feelings for them. A Covert, on the other hand, like a malignant Psycho, is 'silent but deadly' rather than an unfunny Taz From Tasmania.) "But there's so much that's my fault, i like the attention, i play into it and sometimes act sedductive, I've been thinking about it and there's so much that I did, i never denied him, but there's a small voice in the back of my head tellig me that it's not my fault and that it's his fault because he's an adult, that voice caused me to post this, but i still feel as if its my fault. I'd like some advice about what to do." Full Marks - 10-out-of-10 - absolutely correct - you lack experience thus proper frames of reference in order to know precisely where and whether and HOQ precariously you stand. For example: might he have corrupted the snap-chat record (they have a cache, surely? - or in case you DID save the chats) to make out you contacted him? But anyway - And he deserves whatever you decide to do to ensure his trying to hunt a GenZ down, gets him his suitable consequence (and potentially, life-sentance psychologically). Maybe even secretly rope some friends in, eh? Or just randomly, without-warning, ghost him. Being rejected, abandoned (thereby criticised and found lacking and certainly not hypnotic enough) when it wasn't their idea...flips the scipt....does their head in (by varying degrees depending on How you do it and how God-complexed they are....SMASH his fail-safe, old faithful, "hit or be hit" belief system into smithereens. And THEN where will he be?! Forced to seek help to learn adult maturity and ways (because suddenly HE'S his own victim, has something HE needs from it, HE stands to gain; they'll never cure themselves for any one person's sake. They hate people, and their opposite gender even more so. It's impossible for it to be your fault. Even if you were THIRTY-three. There ISN'T any Co-Creation thus Co-Respnosibility - nor even PART blame - in a fauxlationship with an emotional conman. Even psychiatrists fall prey and only realise once they're too hooked to extricate themselves without considerable pain. But you're unlikely to fall for him because you know what he is. Why you're feeling "guilty" and "to blame", is because, that way you have the commensurate onus - and liberty - to fix things, which gives you back some sense of (rightful) control and avoid feeling helpless. Well, you're a member here now. ;) Thoughts? PS: Ellen Page, is it?

Your English is perfect, btw. I had no idea until you said. :) In fact, your English is better than most *English* people's English these days, lol.

I forgot to say: "but what i remember of the chat. though i think i have to put a warning for pedophilia(?) and sexual content. " GOD, yes! Slay that monster and slay him goooood. You go, girl! Sorry - Young Lady! :)