Don’t know what my next move should be…

Hey to whoever might see this! My first time writing something on here. So basically I met this guy on a dating site we moved off the app since things were going well. We had a few FaceTime calls and the vibes were just great tbh. We decided to go on a date and we had a great time and even kissed (which I know possibly not the best idea but I’m 20 with little dating experience I’m still learning). After the communication was there but a little weak so I did a little check in to make sure everything was all right between us. He assured me everything was good on his side and he’s still interested. But the text were less frequent and the calls got shorter. So I momentarily decide to step back not walk away because nothing necessarily happened. But he still interacts with my insta yet doesn’t call or text? It’s odd. I’m still interested, but not sure what going on with him. Idk if I should just leave it as is and see if he reaches out or reach out to him before jumping to conclusions. Any advice would be appreciated!

When someone shows you who they really are, then your best bet is too take notice of their actions. If this guy was really interested, he'd be talking to you straight up, instead of dicking around with Insta... especially after kissing you. Step away, have a good look & follow your gut.

(Sorry for the quick interruption, MoonDoll) Manniiiiiieeeeeeeee! You're back - yayyy! (Did your ears turn Red? :D)

MoonDoll - online dating is rife with that 'keeping their options open' sh*t. Too many sweets in the sweetie shop, meaning, the wicklest boys have twouble choosing, awwwww, or don't want to be left dateless come the next Sat night so are warming others up on-the-side whilst keeping you, likewise, warmed. Much better to meet boyfriends through friends and being out-and-about so I advise your first stop, if you're short of pals at the mo, is to log-onto Friend-making sites. Friends have friends/siblings/rellies...a good few of whom, you might fancy. Nah. You're not a MacDonalds Cheeseburger, are you. So why let yourself be ordered like one? PLUS, it's a playground for Players and Narcs. (..AND HF Aspies but *they're* fine.) (Online dating-schmating......) PS: Tell him you've decided you wanted extra Pickles and plus his Gherkin is too tiny. :P

Hiii thanks for the advice. Yeah online dating never was my thing I only got on a couple of months ago just to try it out some friends said I should “get out there”. I hate that it bothers me so much :/ I’m just so confused why some guys just switch up for seemly no reason? Makes me question if it’s me even though it’s probs not that’s just how stuff is nowadays. Since he’s been interacting with my socials I was gonna go offline for a bit. Mainly to clear my head I’m graduating from college in a few days so I DONT need this right now. What I was contemplating was whether I should reach out mainly to get direct answers. I the kind of person who hates beating around the bush you know? If you don’t want me that fine but say that don’t try to string me along

Yeah, but you haven't got "out there", you've got "IN there", haha!...down into the well-known "Rabbit Holes" (ref Alice-in-Wonderland) to Loonyville. Granted, there are Healthies (like your good self) who dabble on there, but - why take the risk of ending up with an immature or issue-ridden Inept, or gagged and bound in a Narc or, worse, Narc-Spath, or ("game over!") Narc-Psycho fauxlationship, or even someone who's not ready to date (and is enjoying running around the shop, insisting on samples of everything), when there are far safer and cleaner "mating grounds/pools" available in life....like, just popping to your local shop and getting chatting! I mean - your Mum and Dad managed to meet, alright, without interweb, didn't they. :) There we go then. Me, I don't agree with Arranged Marriages but I DO agree with gathering-based introductions from those you trust (if your friends are great and likewise trust the person they're recommending enough). Isn't there site called, My Single Friend? Have you checked that out? "it’s probs not that’s just how stuff is nowadays. " Yeah, no it is. It's not you. Women - AND Men, let's not forget - whinge about how disappointing (AND jading) it is. SOME get lucky. But I note with all these dating-sites Success Stories, it's always too soon-into the relationship, like just after the Honeymoon. (Oh yeah? Let's see how they're doing in another 2-5 years, shall we?) ...Fffffunny, that. Similar to those "get your ex back" web ads. (Yeah, for all of 5 minutes, and half the time you ending up wishing you'd never bothered). Other times, it's simply that the guy knows he can't measure up, in which case it's a compliment (greeeaaaat lol). "Since he’s been interacting with my socials I was gonna go offline for a bit. Mainly to clear my head I’m graduating from college in a few days so I DONT need this right now." CONGRATS! :) And that's a very intuitive, canny idea - even if you didn't realise it was. Yeah, while you can't be uggered, that might 'turn him around' and make him realise you're a Lady. See what happens... But... "What I was contemplating was whether I should reach out mainly to get direct answers. I the kind of person who hates beating around the bush you know? If you don’t want me that fine but say that don’t try to string me along" NO. Our dating wiring is still ancient, meaning, he needs the chase and to be made to work pretty hard to get you to lift another finger! It's like cars. Give a bloke a free Beemer and he'll drive it into a tree. Make him have to work hard for it and he'll treat it like 'royalty', like, keep it services regularly, wash and polish it every Sunday....and ask everyone to take off their shoes before they get in. It's ACTIONS blokes take note of. And so should you ("blah-blah-blah-blah" means nothing without the corresponding action(s)). As Eliza Doolittle says: "Don't (just) tell me - SHOW ME!". Next time - peck on the cheek goodbye and a lovely smile. ("You'll haffter do WAY more and better than tonight, pal, to get a snog out of me! I'm prized goods, doncha know!") (PS: all you have to do to be prized goods is enjoy your own company and care for yourself like you are...get used to it and - VOILA!.... "Her Highness will see you now". It's called Dating Yourself - check it out online.) Keep keeping us posted, tho, won't you ("Dann-dann-daaaaan!")? We'd love to see how this pans-out?

(Listen to Manalone if he has any more gems to add, as well - he knows his stuff and has VERY clear long-vision, even from this distance.)

...Mind you - saying that (about Dating Yourself) - you only gave him a snog, which, obviously, you feel was a bit far for a first date, meaning, you're not far off Royal level anyway (i.e. acting like a Lady already). It's just your inexperience with the game-playing, is all, isn't it. And well done for that impressive show of self-esteem and -respect btw! Mindset: Lady Moondoll does NOT DOOOOOO chasing suitors like some Commoner desperado, thank-you. If you wish to see her again, please send her a letter to request an audience. (At your age/stage, if you're that chilled and prepared to nothing more than drop your hankie (the kiss), they think you must have loads of other blokes vying to get at you, and it gets them doing a double-take. There again - if they have to THINK about it or have cocaine sprinkled on it or something, they probably don't deserve it. But, hey! At least if there IS a prince in there or out there - he'll recognise you instantly by your behaviour! :)

Hi Moondoll, cool name. I would say, things just probably fizzled. It happens. Maybe things were going good, but as more of the curtain got pulled back and things became more "real", he checked out. Or maybe he just let on like things were going better than they were because he wanted to date somebody and not be alone. Or maybe he just ran out of things to talk about - that's possible, too. I've had all of these things happen, I think. If you liked the guy, then just be straight with him and ask him if he wants to keep seeing you or not. If you feel like he's just clowning around, then let it keep on fizzling. Maybe I would avoid Instagram, though. Don't people just go on there to look at and comment on your pictures, or something? If that's the case, he's just looking forward to new crumbs and morsels from you. He's avoiding the mouthwatering cake right in front of him. You're a young and eligible bachelorette, and there's lots of single people who would be interested in getting to know you if he isn't.

Hiii Balance and thank u! I definitely feel like it had to do with the feeling “too real”. He mentioned that sometimes he feels like he self sabotages if things feel like they’re moving too fast. He also thought I was pushing too fast for a relationship. Which I don’t think so I simply set a boundary down “you’re not my bf at this time so I don’t want to take it further” and he understood and slowed down but also felt like I was “forcing” it ig. Oh the irony of it all! Him wanting me to slow down when he basically ate my lip combo off. (Rip to my beautiful lip combo she was too good for the world and way to good for him) TBH I’m filled with so many mixed feelings about this situation in general and maybe that’s why I crave a definite answer? But at the same time I don’t want to fall into mistakes I’ve made in the past so I’m trying to tread wisely before making a decision. I can’t explain but there was something there? Wayyy before the kiss or the date. And I’m pretty good with vibes! That vibe was the reason I decide to give it a shot bc I’m VERY picky with the guys I choose. A KINDA UPDATE? I wont lie I am curious to know what actually happened I hate the overthinking and piecing a story together based on my assumptions. It’s officially been a whole week since we’ve talked. I graduated 2 days ago and surprise surprise he liked all my graduation post. I’m trying to not let it bug me but it does a little bit. But yeah I haven’t reached out to him or anything because how I see it is that even if the last convo we had lead to a bit of miscommunication (like I originally thought) wouldn’t he just text and ask? But then again boys are dumb especially 20 yr olds. It’s obviously not an excuse but yeah that’s where I’m at with this currently !

Hey Moondoll, Well I see! I just now got around to reading your response on this thread. A few days ago I replied to your newer post. I feel like a lot must have changed between when you wrote this, and when you started the new thread. I take it to mean, that you are still seeing this guy and he's the one you made the other post about? RIP to your beautiful lip combo! XD I'll see if I have anything to add when I get back to your other post. I'm playing catch-up with the past 2 weeks of posts.