Wife not in love with me

Married 11 years, great relationship, great sex, wonderful 6 year old daughter, ups & bad downs (bad arguments that led to verbal abuse only of each other...not that its ok), wife wanted to go to counceling together for years but had my reservations and did not, last week she told me she is no longer in love with me and is prepared to leave me, this hurt so bad I was awakened to do whats right, I made appointment and went with her to couples counceling, it will take two to make this work and she is not sure she wants to put the time in not knowing if the end result would make her happy, she wants to see a councelor on her own to aid her in resolving why she has fell out of love and if there is a chance to rekindle the magic that was once there, in the meantime I am not allowed any sex or intimacy while she is in the process of figuring out what she wants, I just asked her in bed if she would like me to snuggle her only if she wanted me to, not to appease me, she said no, so I said I'd go sleep on couch, and she said no she woyld and did...is this marriage done?

Hi. I am so sorry to hear about your problems. I am going to do my best to describe how your wife may feel. Given that she has suggested counseling for years means that she recognized the problems and wanted to correct it before it got too bad. Because you refused for so long, she felt like you didn't care. You simply swept it under the carpet ... thinking it will resolve on its own. Unfortunately, the problem did not go away for her. She finally got your attention by telling you she is done. By this point, she is so discouraged. BUT that does not mean it is the end. Give her some breathing room. Let her go through her counseling ... Alone. Maybe you should seek counseling on your own too??? This will show some initiative. It will show that you are serious and that you do care. In time, maybe she will agree to go through couple's counseling. In the meantime, be patience. Be available for her emotionally. It will take some time for her to be intimate again. I think you will find that she is worth the wait. Good luck!