Wife wants separation

wife wants a divorce but doesnt want to regret making the big decision and being the bad guy. she is real big on others opinion of her. i do not want a divorce but rather commit to counseling and the saving of our marriage. she has befriended a coworker whom is going through a separation and spends tons of time with him on the phone, texting, and running or lunches at work. she now wants a separation. i think she wants time to pursue him without the guilt of doing it while married. she hides when he calls her from me, and i overheard her tell him that she is so happy that he is in her life and that she doesnt know what she would do without his support. meanwhile she wants space at home to sort her feelings about whether or not she wants to put in the work to salvage our 15 year relationship. should i go with separation or just divorce?

That really sucks!! It sounds like your wife is elsewhere. Whether she's having a physical affair, an emotional affair or no affair, it doesn't sound as if she's interested in your marriage. Ask her straight out if she's having an affair and if she admits it, that's closure for you. If she denies it but still maintains that she wants a divorce, let it happen. Trying to hang onto something that isn't there will only prolong your hurt and hurt you more in the end.