Girlfriend flirting at the clubs

So I have been in a 3 year relationship with a woman the I love dearly. If it matters I'm 42 and she is 36. There have been some problems that I have had a hard time dealing with. So I should start with the first incident. We were out together and there was dancing. Dancing isn't my favorite thing, but since it's important to her I will do it. Well we where out with her friend and she said she was going to go and dance with her friend. I went to get a drink and then I was people watching and saw her on the dance floor grinding face to face with some random guy. He was grabbing her butt, and she was returning the favor. This really upset me and she said it was just dancing and I shouldn't be upset. I personally don't think that grinding is dancing, and felt totally disrespected. She promised that she wouldn't do it again since it upset me. I know people make mistakes and I forgave her and we moved on. Now the most recent incident has me very worried. She went out with her single friend clubbing. She told me that when leaving the club she ran into some guys on the walk to her friends car. At first she just said that she asked them for a ride home, but the strange thing was is she said that one of the guys said "I know what is going on here, I guess I will just get a cab ride home" She says the she set the guy straight that he had the wrong idea. Anyways she proceeds to get a ride home from these two guys that she just met, she was very drunk as well, and said nothing happened. This upset me very much, for one it sounded very dangerous, but secondly I couldn't figure out why one of the guys thought they should get a cab ride home. She said all they did was talk, and this supposedly happened in a five minute walk. So I began to press her for more answers/info. So she finally admits that she was flirting with the guy who was going to drive, and told him how sexy he was and would he mind giving her a ride. She says that was innocent and I shouldn't be upset. I'm not sure what I should do.

Hi yes I think drinking has alot to do with thins here. I would be concerned about her. She may land herself in a dangerous situation some night if she is not careful that is something a 14 year old would do. Drink changes people.

She is outgoing, but not flirty to the point that she would hit on someone and get a ride home from them. I'm starting to think she does have a problem with drinking. However I'm worried that she has been unfaithful.

Joeberg, alcohol doesn't lie and when your GF actions speak to you in a different language when she's drunk, then you're are seeing the real person. If she drinks and her actions offend you and your outlook on how a loving couple should act, then it's telling you just where your relationship with her is at. Personally, I wouldn't be with a woman who allowed random men to grope her, drunk or sober, in any circumstances, even if she thought it was just harmless dancing. The fact that you had to forgive her then and now the latest episode has you more hurt and upset should tell you everything in bold black and white. You're right, she has disrespected you and it doesn't matter if she'd been drinking, the fact is that she has disrespected herself more so. Sure, we all relax after a few drinks but it's our behavior when we drink which telegraphs to others how much respect we have for ourselves and other people. If we have no respect for ourselves then we can't respect anyone else and that includes those closest to us. Quite frankly Joeberg, your GF may have issues with alcohol, but your relationship is becoming one sided because she basically has stopped contributing to it. If she reciprocated your love, trust and respect you wouldn't be here on this forum.