Confused and hurts

Hi, I am looking for outside prospective rather than my friends that would not be objective. I am really hurt and confused in regards with a man I had been seeing since 3 months... 3 months is short but not when you have been friends for a while and have friends in common and we are part of same sport clubs... Few weeks ago i found him changed, sort of not interested or fancying me and I wanted to know if there was anything going on... I found him more interested in someone else, and he never wanted people of our group friends we were seeing each other. He told me he did not want people to know in case he would not work out and that he never been interested i that woman i referred to... From that conversation, he has been getting more and more distant and did not want to see me... Barely any messages.... I know his life is complicated with a son he cannot see much and his mom that has cancer but those facts were there since we starting dating and i knew i was never gonna be a priority but at least wanted to feel that I am a little part of his life and wanted to support him... I have messaged him so many times because he was not even contacted me anymore and i just wanted to know what was going on and how to work things out but he just went on silent ; i feel like i have been stalking him but i just don't understand what I did wrong... And going silent is so cruel... He sent me a message saying things went crazy. A little too quick and serious and that he does not want to lose a friend ; i don't understand because I have never arrange him to meet my friends, family, move in etc... I don't understand whats too quick he was the one wanting to learn my language in case he meets my family, the one who thought about spending his birthday together and xmas. I never mentioned any of these ... The only thing i wanted to do is something special for his birthday as he said no one ever done anything for him... I just said we see closer to the dates to arrange things.... I don't know what I have done wrong ... I just want answers and he refuses to talk , he cant even look at me when we are at the club... I just feel really hurt and i don't understand what I have done... I thought a relationship was based on communication, i just don't know anymore...

If he was any sort of a mature man, he would have sat you down and spoke to you face to face. Unfortunately, his actions say the opposite. You're correct when say it's cruel to go silent and it really doesn't matter what personal issues he has, if he was genuine, he would have acted like a genuine man. The only wrong thing you are doing is letting the whole situation get you down. You deserve better so you need to move on to find a better man who has respect for you as well as for himself.

Its difficult to deal with it as we are part of same club, it is true I cannot accept it because I don't understand why he would tell things showing a commitment with me being the one who tamed it... I don't understand what he called too serious... Even asked him if he did really care at one point or if he wanted to end it sooner... The only response i had ( only texts, he will not pick up calls or see me face to face) was i am sorry, I cannot answered those questions... You deserve better..; i don't understand why he cannot speak to me and answer those simple questions, i really don't understand and that gets to me ...

If he can only text you, then it says it all. He could have issues which prevent him from having a relationship with you or he could be just trying to back off after he realised that he can't do it...or he could be just a full on user and liar. He may not even know the answers himself. Regardless, the point is that he won't/can't give you the closure that you need by discussing with you his reasons for breaking up. You now need to step away from him and if it proves to be too difficult, you may need to find a new sporting club. Don't pursue it, but rather deal with it and then get on with your life. You are correct in every way that he owes it to you to speak face to face and explain everything, but if he won't, then you can't make him.