My husband and I are falling apart

My husband i have only been married for 11 months and we argue all the time . Two days before we got married i found out that he was on a dating site talking sexual to 13 different women . We had a lot going on before then i was always working and he say I wasn't giving him the attention that he needed . I was so focused on our kid and my Job ..we always passed each other . He works at night and i worked morning time . I never cheated on him even though I wasn't getting what I needed also , but yet he cheated to this way I can't get it out my mind . Now all we do is argue and he only is focused on football and his Job . I dont know what to do anymore ..how can u get over finding out he has been cheating 2 days before your wedding day ??

It took me a long time. Hell, I'm still affected by it. Between when he came home for us to get married (military) and him meter our first child at two weeks, he "supposedly" got black out drunk, cheated, and caught something. Since I've found him talking to other females on his locked phone, a lot of times innapropriately. I can't get hI'm to help out around the house, he won't bath or change our youngest, and for him to bath and change the oldest is extremely rare. I know I don't work, it's my job, but he needs time with the kids. We went to marriage counseling and learned the 5 love languagea. A lot of good it did us. I never cheated, I've never talked innapropriately to another man that involved the two of us. But here I stand, troubled as ever.

My husband doesn't want to do counseling . But i feel as if we need to really bad