Expectations

Is it wrong for me to expect for my wife to lose weight and get in better shape? I find myself looking at other, smaller women wishing my wife looked like that. She is about a size 18, but she always wears larger clothing to hide her fat. I want to see my wife in leggings, short shorts, and tight dresses. Don't get me wrong, I love my wife and I love seeing my wife naked, but I would like to see her be a little "sexier" with her dress and I know that won't happen until she loses weight. So what do I do? I've tried leading by example. I've tried shopping for groceries. I've tried going to the gym with her. I've tried everything. What's next??

Are you in better shape than she is and are you in better shape than your peers? Do you want your wife to be in better shape for her? for you? or for your peers? What does your wife want for herself? What does she like to do? Telling someone to lose weight to be "sexier" probably doesn't make her feel good. Maybe you guys can have a playful competition to eat better and exercise more often? Is there a certain activity that she enjoys doing? Like dancing, sports, etc? Just talk to her and LISTEN. Try to understand how she feels about her weight and what HER goals are (not yours!).