Life Update and continuation of "Am I in the wrong here?"

Hi all! I am not sure of these types of updates are allowed on here or not. I kind of lost track of the time and the last thread expired. @SOULMATE How's everything? So life update - I have since finally moved out of my hometown to another city for work. And then to another city again within the span of 5 months to pursue a part time course in science. I always wanted to go into science as I mentioned in the previous thread. Anyway, why I made this thread again is that despite the fact that I have friends from college here in the new city and more of a social circle than I did in the earlier city or my hometown, in day-to-day life, I feel quite lonely. Maybe more lonely than I have ever felt. Sometime ago, J unblocked me. Don't ask me how I know. I know I wasn't supposed to look but I did. On top of that, I recently met SU, who is a close friend of J and I mentioned to her the things that transpired. She did mention that J does tend to push people away sometimes. But anyway now does not seem like anything will resolve. I was feeling very vulnerable that time (a couple nights ago) and almost texted J. Now the point of the above ramble is I don't understand why am I not able to get over this thing. I have fallen in love before and gotten over it. This was too short to call it love or anything romantic. But I will repeat what I told SU that I am a very sensitive person and J was sensitive in the same way and same kind of things and for the first time in forever I felt myself reflected back and understood. I know I am probably just making it up all in my head and it wasn't such a big deal. Therapy helped and I was fine for a time but I stopped it after my therapist said I no longer required it. But as soon as I feel lonely, I start slipping again it seems.

Oops. Forgot to link the original thread - https://www.peoplesproblems.org/showtopic/13160/am-i-in-the-wrong-here-should-i-apologise

(Well done. :)) Howdy, stranger! Be with you as soon as I possibly can but I'm in the midst of a busynami at the mo, including, got guests, including, bug-ridden (great combo..not). Hang tight... PS: If you could possibly respond to one or more of the new OPs whom are queing, that'd help massively and mean I could get to you sooner? No pressure though, just - 'don't ask, don't get'. :)

Sure. Let me check.

Don't worry - the queue got tackled, but - if any new ones come in?...that'd be super-duper. Right, then! (Not reading ahead as per) "Hi all! I am not sure of these types of updates are allowed on here or not." They''re not just allowed - they're welcomed gratefully! :) Closure, innit...plus existing victims given the means to not just hope, but KNOW a happy ending can await them too. Lily31 (Parents Split Up) is just posting postcards lately, as well (she and Dishy are getting married soon!!...plus her Dud has instigated a huge, geographical distance (which is vital for healing all the way) by upping stix to the US (move in with and work for his Sugar Mummy, basically)....we're all overjoyed!). "I kind of lost track of the time and the last thread expired." Yeah, I take half-blame, though, because so did I. WHAT ARE WE LIKE, EH? Lol. "@SOULMATE How's everything? " TOO BUSY AND UP-DOWN ILL! (,thanks for asking haha) But, that aside, it's been good, thanks...been taming and feeding the feral and abandoned cats around here (one-by-one) and making more improvements to the house and garden...poco a poco, as the Spanish say...Plod-plod-plod-yawn-grr-fckinurryup!, as I say)....and other things 'n stuff. Don't know where the time's been going. "So life update - I have since finally moved out of my hometown to another city for work." Excellent! 'A change is as good as a rest'. "And then to another city again within the span of 5 months to pursue a part time course in science. I always wanted to go into science as I mentioned in the previous thread." Yes, I remember. Well that's brilliant, then! (Ooh - tell me soe interesting science facts!) "Anyway, why I made this thread again is that despite the fact that I have friends from college here in the new city and more of a social circle than I did in the earlier city or my hometown," Good stuff. "...in day-to-day life, I feel quite lonely. Maybe more lonely than I have ever felt." Unconnected, is what it actually-factually is... from yourself. That, added to the fact that these friendships are too new to be as mentally intimate as you feel you need. This is all normal, no wozzies. But not nice. "Sometime ago, J unblocked me. Don't ask me how I know. I know I wasn't supposed to look but I did." I'M EXPERIENCING THE EXACT SAME THING MYSELF!....HOOVERING (attempt No... I've lost count). Was this text or FB messenger - and would she be able to tell you opened and read it? "On top of that, I recently met SU, who is a close friend of J and I mentioned to her the things that transpired." Ah-hah!.... "She did mention that J does tend to push people away sometimes." HAHAHAHAHAHA! Putting it sodding mildly. I have a a narc meme that goes something like, 'When someone keeps telling you the Narc is actually a decent person" - and the 'you' is depicted as a clearly effed-off bloke replying to the Flying Monkey with an incredulous and cynical, 'O..kaaayyyyyy...?'. ...Putting it TOO mildly ...and non-malignantly...i.e. Minimising her crimes...and in a way that brings into the mix THE PITY PLOY(!) ("Awww, poor J, she's not evil, she's just disabled, awwww...feel sorry for her, excuse her and give her a Hall Pass...Because that's what I constantly do (because I have to; I'm lonely and desperate) and I neither want to pop my own bubble of self-delusion nor want my bubble burst FOR me (by you)." BIT OF COINCIDENCE, ISN'T IT? J CONTACTS YOU AGAIN AND J'S FRIEND - SU - ON HEARING YOUR REPORT - RE-COLOURS HER PRETTY TO YOU! Gosh, what coinkydinky timing. J UNBLOCKED YOU BECAUSE SHE HEARD FROM SU HOW YOU WERE SO OVER HER THAT YOU HAD SEEN THROUGH HER....AND THAT MEANS YOU COULD BLOW THE WHISTLE WITH MANY *MORE* PEOPLE SHE KNOWS AND DESTROY HER PUBLIC MASK OF A DECENT AND A VICTIM (LIKE THEM)! She wants to charm you....re-Love-Bomb you so you'll think you were wrong and go straight back to the beginning and do the entire tour all over again....including another discard. 'Does tend to push people away sometimes' - pff!.... Yeah! The ones that don't buy her false act and become another fan and/or manage to trick and interrogate them into a corner (from which the only escape is - BLOCK/GHOST!)! "But anyway now does not seem like anything will resolve. I was feeling very vulnerable that time (a couple nights ago) and almost texted J. " Oh, thank God for 'almost'!!! (OMG, don't do that haha!) "Now the point of the above ramble is I don't understand why am I not able to get over this thing." This is why they're called - BY PSYCHIATRISTS AND THE ENTIRE PSYCHOTHERAPEUTIC INDUSTRY - as Emotionally *Dangerous*. They seriously disturb your mind (and stick like effing glue). Plus, you've just been re-triggered when the whole incident wasn't that long ago. Even with changing your environment/scene (gold star!) to speed it up - it can take 2-5 years. It's not about tenure. It's about how quickly and deeply you - when connection/attachment was what you needed most - were invited to attach, going from 0 to 60mph far faster than a REAL car could manage...only a fantasy car and a pretend (one-sided) attachment...into ADDICTION. You're at the psychological version of The Priory (for addiction to alcohol) - wherever you may geographically be. You haven't drunk for months and months and nor even missing it, but, then suddenly, in swoops J, not just with alcohol but with your favourite, luxury tipple. So that you'll stop telling on her. "I have fallen in love before and gotten over it." Yes. And, Yes. But this wasn't falling in Love - AT ALL. This was your mind being manipulated by a giant manipulator to become a drugs factory so that it would addict your brain to that 'drug supplier' and only her, whereby you'd do ANYTHING for her, not to get chucked and lose your drugs (Dopamine's the main one, and Adrenaline, the various Endorphins...we're talking "Snake Bite"). She got you very quickly mesmirised and addicted by presenting as the answer to your lonely, neglected prayers. That was her Lure. Remember school? They'd say - If you give me one of your sweeties, I'll be your best friend. So you'd give them a sweet (in fact, would have anyway)...and then another...and another....until you're half-starved and the sweets are all gone (on her). And then, suddenly, your best friend just 'cuts off' the interest. Because it was the sweeties she was after. She doesn't LIKE 'friends'...people... But she likes and needs sweeties and can't afford any herself. Maybe Su told J that your pockets were replenished, once more full of sweeties?...as WELL as, needs to charm you into silence...GET YOU BACK INSIDE HER CAGE WHERE SHE CAN CONTROL YOU. "This was too short to call it love or anything romantic." Yuss. Connection and Attachment. "But I will repeat what I told SU that I am a very sensitive person" I know, and it's LOVELY. :) Because, you're two-way-street sensitive, not one-way like J (for Joker). NOTHING is reciprocated, bar pretend-reciprocity (usually just empty words or cheap little actions). "and J was sensitive in the same way and same kind of things" Yes but, as above, only incoming: where only HER feelings and sensitivities were real and mattered. They can't/won't/dunwanna/refuse to Reciprocate, Cooperate, any of that normal stuff that makes human-human relationships equally pleasant and enhancing for BOTH partners. You're not a partner, you're an Oxygen Tank. "and for the first time in forever I felt myself reflected back and understood." What she understood was how neglected and starving hungry you were and how that would make you easily duped and puppeteered (a puppet can't ever say something hurtful (i.e. truthful), can it). "I know I am probably just making it up all in my head" Nope! (Don't start that again.) "and it wasn't such a big deal." It is a VERY big deal when someone messes-up your very Neurology, Chemistry and Wellbeing by persuading you to take off your bandages but then beating you up by punching you in all your wound sites (they can smell where they're situated) - so that they will open up again! Just the mere SOUND of them is a trigger to your mind (and quite right too!). Let's try a simpler analogy: You're starving hungry, all you've been receiving for a long time is crumbs. J is a cream cake. But she's riddled in Salmonella. Last time you took the bite that she OFFERED you to take, you came down with food poisoning. Now, here she is again, but using her Flying Monkey this time (cos the things and ways you relayed/summed-up to Su about J, showed J it'd take a Double-Pincer lure-job this time round) as extra reassurance and persuasion that she's only a poor wickle, well-meaning, needful, confused girlie-whirlie-boo-boos, REALLY.) (Pffffffff!) (Anyone tells me someone is "a good person, REALLY", I say - 'The thing with genuinely good people is that no-one ever describes them as a good person *really*; they say, they're a really good person. Ain't that right, Yoda. (Yoda says - It yes is ;))." "Therapy helped and I was fine for a time but I stopped it after my therapist said I no longer required it." Errr........NOT HER CALL. It's yours. ...But - back to - came down with food poisoning. Picture yourself there, in this actual scenario: Do you save yourself by taking in food and this time hope it's safe and nothing bad will happen? Or will you either half- or fully-(slow)kill yourself by getting infected again a second time - and too soon since the first? "But as soon as I feel lonely, I start slipping again it seems." OF COURSE! Because you're normal and healthy but just ucking hungry and sick to death of being hungry all the time. Well, welcome back to the Pit-Stop Cafe! No problemos, Senor! Tell me more - and your thoughts/feelings. (In fact - if you want to paste in here her Hoovering attempt message, I'll be able to know what she's thinking and planning, and customise my solution(s) for you, so feel free. Or just loosely describe what she said?) I'm glad you didn't respond because...From J's point of view, she'll automatically be getting a taste of their own Cognitive Dissonance medicine: "Either SM isn't interested OR hasn't got time...which-is-it, which-is-it - I am no longer in control - aaargh". (FYi we Healthies/Empaths cope with Cognitive Dissonance far better than they ever could.) Now look at the timing. JUST BEFORE CHRISTMAS....THE LONELY-FOR-SINGLETONS SEASON - oh, what a sodding coinkybloodydinky, NOT. That's to make it far more difficult to resist. Well, I'm going to do an Xmas party/"Gathering" thread this year and you're automatically invited so.... drop in or stay all day...we can all/anyone have a drinkie or three, get tiddly, tell jokes, swap memes, start fascinating conversations, be playful and silly, have a whinge and a moan haha (about the small stuff), swap Life Hacks....Play Hangman, even! Sky's the limit. Plus, if any of you puke - YOU have to clean it up! :D (Bit better?)

" Either SM isn't interested" HUH? Ignore that - obvs was meant to be HB (you) but I was fleetingly thinking/comparing with 'mine': I've read but done zero reply, too. That - you not biting/not taking the bait, makes 'em feel utterly humiliated (*yet not quite convinced they should be)...and insecure (that they've lost their dark magic!), angry, of course... Puts them in Cognitive Dissonance, though, *because you COULD EITHER be (a) refusing to reply/ignoring OR (b) just too busy at the mo., making (b1) he might still reply, leading to (b2) 'but then, how long should I wait?'. Cog Diss and being unable to know or decide where one stands and what/when/how to do, are far more disturbing to Narctic* Power & Control-Freaks (loss of despotic power over someone useful yet "inferior to them" = 'a sign that I'm actually nothing, panic-panic!'), than it is to us (loss of decision-making capability over whether we should/could fix the situation). (PS: *new word - spread it round :)) ...What GOES AROUND!.....COMES around! PS: Re the illusion of sensitivity ("I'm sensitive, just like you!") that The Joker gave you: "Yes but, as above, only incoming: where only HER feelings and sensitivities were real and mattered." This is known as, *Insensitive Yet Incredibly Thin-Skinned*.

Hi again! Bit of delay here as I got sick. I think I should have mentioned the timeline as well. She unblocked me back in May. I met the friend last month. So, I don't think it was some sort of hint to talk to her. And it is also not the case that she unblocked me because she came to know something about me from her friend because this friend I haven't talked to in a long time before coming here (back in August). "Was this text or FB messenger - and would she be able to tell you opened and read it?" It was on Instagram. She did not message me actually. But I think someone posted something from her and I was able to see her profile so that is how I knew (if you are blocked their profile shows up as blank and you cannot search for them). "Errr........NOT HER CALL. It's yours. " Yeah I mean we mutually decided to gradually reduce the number of sessions and I felt like I no longer required it. "Tell me more - and your thoughts/feelings" Well, getting sick and getting rest was a bit of a reset. The last few months have been hectic. Plus, I am going home for some time and attending Coldplay so that should help. I am still feeling about this partly due to lack of my dating success I think. In this big city, I see couples everywhere and that makes me feel the lack of romantic love in my life. I have tried dating apps and stuff but it hasn't worked so far. So it all makes me think like oh there was a chance in the past and there won't be another like it again and stuff like that. "(Ooh - tell me soe interesting science facts!)" Well did you know the gravitational wave discovery that happened a few years ago was so sensitive that it only moved the detector thingy 1/1000th the size of a proton! I missed the party but Happy New Year to you!

You've been ill too? All my friends are ill as well. All in that same up-down-up-down - I'm all better - No I'm not, it's back! - way, whether or not they had vomiting and/or diarrhoea with it. I'm busy playing catch-up because I ALSO lost all internet for blinking ages. But - be with you soon!

Small update. I just found out from a friend that she's going to be at a concert that I'm gonna be attending too. It's a fairly big one so hopefully I won't run into her. (Although some part of me wishes that I do)

"I think I should have mentioned the timeline as well. She unblocked me back in May. I met the friend last month. So, I don't think it was some sort of hint to talk to her. And it is also not the case that she unblocked me because she came to know something about me from her friend because this friend I haven't talked to in a long time before coming here (back in August). Was this text or FB messenger - and would she be able to tell you opened and read it?" It was on Instagram. She did not message me actually. But I think someone posted something from her and I was able to see her profile so that is how I knew (if you are blocked their profile shows up as blank and you cannot search for them)." Oh, I see. But that just changes things, not improves. Question: WHEN HAD BEEN THE LAST TIME THAT *SU* HAD SEEN/HAD CONTACT WITH *JOKER* prior to this re-appearance to you in November? Because it's a bit funny how you're furtively let back into Joker's Instagramworld in May and, when you don't respond, up pops Su. ? Have a think? Whichever... Then the reason Joker secretly unblocked you was to lure you back. Hoover attempt. "Errr........NOT HER CALL. It's yours. " Yeah I mean we mutually decided to gradually reduce the number of sessions and I felt like I no longer required it." What made you believe that? And how come your therapist didn't question it? "Tell me more - and your thoughts/feelings" Well, getting sick and getting rest was a bit of a reset. The last few months have been hectic." In that case, it would have been a good *start* to recalibration. "Plus, I am going home for some time and attending Coldplay so that should help." OOH, YOU LUCKY BARSTOOL!!! Bloody LOVE Coldplay! Jeez, how much were your tickets? Who you going with? "I am still feeling about this partly due to lack of my dating success I think." Yup. You're recovered enough that you're again ready for a cuddle. Trouble is, cuddlees are scarce (because you've been busy as well as in Emotional Hospital), so obviously your mind turns to the nearest available source. Well, that sparkly-looking well is, as you know, poisoned so - nope. "In this big city, I see couples everywhere and that makes me feel the lack of romantic love in my life." You and a thousand-million others, mate. "I have tried dating apps and stuff but it hasn't worked so far." Anyone who thinks they can arrange a beau like you order a MacD's is going to end up with a MacPartner (or downright clown). "So it all makes me think like oh there was a chance in the past and there won't be another like it again and stuff like that. " Tsk. Real psych fact: It's harder to AVOID getting into a relationship than it is, bumping into one. Fate plays a huge part. And if it's making you wait then that''s for two reasons: (1) to FINISH healing and strengthening, and, (2) because it takes Fate far longer to rustle up a 5-star Egon Ronay meal than a Big Mac. Innit. Where partners are concerned, it should be Chateau Briande from now on. You, my laddie, are NOT a Mac-anything. And you certainly don't need chronic Salmonella poisoning. "(Ooh - tell me soe interesting science facts!)" Well did you know the gravitational wave discovery that happened a few years ago was so sensitive that it only moved the detector thingy 1/1000th the size of a proton!" I heard about the wave discovery but didn't know it was THAT miniscule! There again, I suppose I did, because Gravity isn't as strong as Electromagnetism etc, is it, except for on a grand scale mass-wise. "I missed the party but Happy New Year to you!" It didn't happen as I lost both internet and any useable moby signal (one tiny dot, it was!). Fate stepped in and said to myself and guests - geddoff yer arses and go outside and get some fresh air! (Haha - yes, mum.) Hippy New Year to you too! Roger and Over?....

PS: I hope you DON'T! How big is the venue? I mean, this IS Coldplay, right? Maybe you could go in-disguise?...false tash, all of that?, haha. Promise me you won't approach her if you see her, only if you find yourself forced to talk back - like, she comes up and says Hello. And even then, promise me (trust me, you'll feel better for it) you'll just reply with a upwards-forehead nod whilst saying a neutral-WITH-A-WHIFF-of-boredom, 'Alright?' (and that's all). Let's get her chasing YOU, shall we? Because trust me - when you manage to turn the tables is when YOU...lose all respect for THEM, while pity and disgust takes over. It's like seeing pulling back the curtain and seeing 'The Wizard Of Oz' is just a mental cripple - but too ridiculous yet nasty with it. PPS: Plus, do ensure at the first opportunity to ask her 'not to use "that" word as you find it offensive as well as outdated', won't you, haha. (Little Victories haha...but seriously - take back off her what you can).

oh noooo. i just posted a reply and got logged out and lost it all. maaaan. i'm gonna put my love into the world and type it all again. lol what i think is happening is that your 'guard' is up now that you're in a new city. noticing more of your environment, and feeling things more deeply as a defense mechanism in the new place. what _i would do is find common interests. go where your kind of people are and find your scene. over time your guard will come down and without noticing the dopamine is hitting its receptors and you're happier overall and smiling more. words of caution to fight the inclination to internalize your loneliness. your mind is saying it's a problem so don't take that deeper. like a great sage once said 'what replaces old memories, nothing. make new ones'

H, any update? How was Coldplay, "etcetera"?

"when you don't respond, up pops Su. ? Have a think?" Well, I reached out to her haha (Su) "What made you believe that? And how come your therapist didn't question it?" Difficult to answer. I will elaborate on it soon. "OOH, YOU LUCKY BARSTOOL!!! Bloody LOVE Coldplay! Jeez, how much were your tickets? Who you going with?" I went with some college friends. It was about $60-$70 per ticket, which in Indian currency is a lot. But it was really worth it. It was the largest Coldplay concert ever. It was sooo gooood! Quite a lifetime experience. I have liked Coldplay and Chris Martin for so many years. Plus, they played my favorite ("Everglow") on a fan request. Forget her, I did not even run into people I knew were there. "what i think is happening is that your 'guard' is up now that you're in a new city. noticing more of your environment, and feeling things more deeply as a defense mechanism in the new place. what _i would do is find common interests. go where your kind of people are and find your scene. over time your guard will come down and without noticing the dopamine is hitting its receptors and you're happier overall and smiling more. " Yeah thanks for the advice! That's what I have been trying to do lately. Going to board games and other social events.

""when you don't respond, up pops Su. ? Have a think?" Well, I reached out to her haha (Su)" Doh! I should have warned you to treat carefully with any mutual friends or acquaintances. "What made you believe that? And how come your therapist didn't question it?" Difficult to answer. I will elaborate on it soon." Roger that! "OOH, YOU LUCKY BARSTOOL!!! Bloody LOVE Coldplay! Jeez, how much were your tickets? Who you going with?" I went with some college friends. It was about $60-$70 per ticket, which in Indian currency is a lot." Google says, 6,114.82 Indian Rupees and approx 100 rupees to the Pound! About 611 British Quid, then, yes? Not sure how much tickets are in UK but, I imagine quite a bit more than that, even! (From what I've seen, Brits have always had to pay way more than the rest of the world. E.g. when CDs were 15 Quid, the Americans were getting them for 5.) "But it was really worth it. It was the largest Coldplay concert ever. It was sooo gooood!" Cor, yeah, I can imagine.... "Quite a lifetime experience." Yeah, alright, don't rub it in? LOL "I have liked Coldplay and Chris Martin for so many years. Plus, they played my favorite ("Everglow") on a fan request. Forget her, I did not even run into people I knew were there." Haaaaaaaaallelujia! And I like the way you tagged it on the end, there, like an afterthought ("Oh, yeah - HER"). And I presume the concert lifted a spirits a great deal too, yes? Concerts like that are more like a Phenomenon than plain event, aren't they. Did it have a noticeable bonding effect on you and your friends? PS: "Going to board games and other social events." EX-cellent sign! Yeah, you're on your way up. Keep going and it won't be too long until you're enjoying life again, then enjoying singledom (who'da thunk it?!), and THEN someone special will cross paths with you....And you'll think, 'Don't mind if I do, don't mind if I don't' (but will 'strangely' decide Do, regardless)...which is a great place to start because then you've got such a full life (for you and your appetite) to begin with that you don't need her, and WON'T need her. (equals nothing to lose)... - except - and until - and because - you've slowly-but-surely fallen for her. In short: there's having a hole that needs to be filled with someone, and then there's wanting and having to MAKE a hole for someone. Diff/all the diff.

(PS: Cool fact btw. No, I did NOT know that...well, not re. that precise measurement, no. Tell me another! (Fact Monster: "nom-nom-NOMMMMM!')

Ummm I fucked up. I was at a house party a couple of days ago and had too much to drink. I was thinking about all this stuff and I called a friend. I told me maybe I should send her a friend request. He said sure what's to loose and I did end up sending her a request. Luckily, I checked today and she did not accept it. I don't know what to feel about it. In a way, it feels like this should finally help me get closure this thing but it I also regret going back to old ways.

Hah! Chortle-chortle! No, actually. What you've done - SORRY - what your subconscious (inner animal) has done (while your conscious and self-control was out of it thus out of the way) is full of potential in terms of, supremely sneakily handy (closure purposes). I'm poorly again at the mo., this time, sinus (Spain = go out and about for too long = guaranteed bug!) so as soon as I have the energy I'll explain what I mean. Just - in the meantime, while you're waiting for me: if she does Accept or contact - DO NOTHING....Sit on your hands. But I'm giggling away so - you won't get any telling-off from me. Except for this (albeit, you're excused for being foreign): It's LOSE, not loose. You loosen a tie to make it loose (or looser), but if you misplace and can`t find that tie, you LOSE it (or have lost it). As you were/was/wiz, LOL. Seriously - there's zero need to worry about it. Me, I'm chuckling my face off (...oh, the possibilities). Inabitz!

Right!... It's not what you've done, it's HOW and WHEN you've done it. Like this 80s hit (play it!): Picture Fakebook inviting as a bird-call. As far back as *December*, she went, 'Ah-caa, ah-caa!' (- unblocked you). Nothing came back....Not a peep! ....Until THREE....WHOLE....MONTHS... later. Not (Narc attitude) it's HER turn to blank YOU. Seeing it? I mean - who SANE would have gone off the idea of re-making contact within, contextually-speaking, so SHORT a period? Yuh - right (yawn). What you've done is, Out-Narced the Narc. And it's even worse than that (for her) because she - Little Miss Controller/Know Everything - doesn't know WHY you Friend-invited her, does she. For all SHE knows, it could be: a) You, taking the piss. b) A case of "butter-fingers" - a mis-send. c) A psychological booty-call (which it was). d) Boredom. e) A taste of her own medicine (which it was). f) Wanting to be able to 'show all your friends' the witch (haha)... "the one that *mercifully* got away" (hahaha!) - for which you obviously need access. g) Ditto, to your new girlfriend. h) A lure, to be allowed within reaching distance, before suddenly launching into her, giving her a piece of your mind...a ruddy long lecture about what a pathetic user-loser-sh*thead she is - AND to tell her you're *grateful and relieved* she slammed the door in your face....or perhaps to really shove her face in the mirror and tell her what she is. i) For a lads', drunken DARE and nothing more, meaning, if she DID accept, you might then immediately Block *her*... Quite possibly - in addition - ALSO because you didn't spend that entire duration of the concert, actively looking for her (*rolls eyes*) (- remember, they're nothing if not unrealistic, delusional, unaffected by social no-nos, and (NSpath) No Shame...and, anyway, if their *own* ego was the one in it, that's exactly what they'd do... they can be downright obsessed during The Chase/Re-Chase, as if their life depended on it...which in a way it does: their ego shrivelling fatally). So that - failing to respond - will be her punishment and retribution, for having previously IGNORED Her Highness(!) when she tried to re-summon you to her Court. Bear in mind, however, that what it means is, she COULD/MIGHT eventually respond (in which case, it'll be longer than your 3 months or else she can't be one-up). Well, we'll be ready for her. Just you make sure you prod me if/when that happens. But - what do you think? PS: You're far cleverer - as in, artful - than you realise, you are. (Nice one.)

Tsk - forgot the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_Z2s51lsOI Also forgot one: j) Experimenting with her / on her.

And, oh, look!...it ends on J. On *J*. Spookilydinky or wot! (PS: Coinkidinky/Coincidental plus Spooky. New word - spread it round the ether, peas/tanks.