Mocked for my fetish

Sorry guys but I had to get to the point of posting this. Around the summer a new girl joined my group and relatively immediately, she learned from the others about my foot fetish. At first she took it strangely, she wanted us to go to the beach on separate days and then in the fall for house gatherings, she flat out told me that she will always wear socks around me because she doesn't like foot fetish. I told her okay, whatever makes you comfortable. The thing is that after a while she started treating it as a game, throwing jabs and teasing, which bothers me, plus she's a pretty girl and since she hasn't taken off her socks yet (from what I've heard she's almost always barefoot around others) I've become deathly curious.

Hi Johnnytap, From my perspective, there is absolutely nothing wrong with having fetishes, turn-ons, interests, etc, etc. Everyone has preferences. And I guess the foot fetish is a pretty popular one, so it's not like this is even anything majorly weird and different from the norm. I think your friend group might be a little rude for bringing up your personal business so casually like that. But I can imagine it's the sort of thing they tease you for, as I'm sure they have something like that with most of the people in your friend group. The thing is, it sounds like this girl is pretty icked out by the thought of being oogled like some sex object. I mean, it's probably not so different from how you would feel if someone you weren't attracted to was sexually aroused by people bending over. You'd do everything in your power not to bend over around them, right? Her insistence on joking around about your fetish a bunch and teasing you is pretty mean, though. Either that's just her personality and she teases you because she generally likes you as a person, or else she does it because she is looking down on you. Or else maybe it's some way to turn the fetish you have into some kind of joke, and help lighten the mood? At any rate, she must not be aware if it bothers you a lot. My advice? It probably wouldn't hurt matters to talk with her in private and explain to her that you're more than what you're into, and don't appreciate just being labeled as this one thing.

Well I've obviously spoken with her about it. And she keeps doing it unfortunately, despite promising not to. Also she connects the jabs to her feet like "ooh guys id love to take my socks off rn but ya know" or suggesting to me I give her a foot massage, which obviously never went through. Its different than just avoiding to "bent over" like you said. The others have fortunately apologized about telling her

I'm leaning towards thinking either that's her personality/sense of humor, or else she is kind of rude and immature. Or maybe she does kind of like that you're into feet and gets her kicks by withholding that from you? However, I would not simply assume this. Consent is key, Johnny. ...It sounds like she's picking on you a lot, and it's hard to say exactly why that is without more context. Either it's a friendly thing, an ignorant thing because she doesn't give it much thought or effort to control herself, or else she is just looking down on you and being a jerk to you. I've had friend groups over the years where acquaintances of ours became the butt of the joke pretty often. And I've been the butt of the joke sometimes. So I think you deserve to know if this is coming from a place of harmlessness or bullying. Do you know any of your friends' sexual preferences/fetishes? Well, maybe when people bring up your foot fetish, you can throw them under the bus and make a sarcastic comment about things they're into to embarrass them. Even if you don't know this girl's personal fetishes, you could probably get on her case about her choice in partners or things she finds attractive. A lot of women like less types of men than you can count on one hand, so you could probably pick her mental processes apart and make her feel stupid if you wanted to. Anyway, just some thoughts. I guess you need to decide whether you actually like it when this chick teases you or not, though.

My friends don't really engage into this kind of teasing at all. Its just her, and since I pretty much dont know anything about her sexual preferences, itd be hard to joke back. In fact, if I get stuck and I dont manage to move her at all, it'll be even more awkward. No I really dont like when "that chick" teases me. Like it may be pleasant for a bit when I see her comfortably lying on the couch and wiggling her socked toes, but it ends up being torturous when it stays that way for months on end (plus the jabs). The only way for this situation to get better is for those socks to go. Thats what makes me feel discriminated amongst the others and is the source of her jokes. If the socks are gone, she loses her upper hand and any joke she does can actually be considered well meaning. Now she just pushes me on a sensitive issue, and even if she stopped making jabs, shes opened the floodgates. My curiosity has been heavily sparked, there's no going back

"Well I've obviously spoken with her about it. And she keeps doing it unfortunately, despite promising not to. Also she connects the jabs to her feet like "ooh guys id love to take my socks off rn but ya know" or suggesting to me I give her a foot massage, which obviously never went through. Its different than just avoiding to "bent over" like you said. The others have fortunately apologized about telling her" She sounds like a slightly sadistic but petty bully to me, Johnny (PS: Hi!), who's enjoying having someone to kick around the room...enjoying the power. And, in your fetishist case - pr*ck-teasing you into the bargain (sex as a weapon). What ELSE would you call it, but systematic bullying (or over-needling, if you prefer)?

Alternatively: She might well be making excuses for the fact that, secretly, she has ugly feet. And, not wanting to 'bare all' in front of a 'foot aficionado' whom might point the fact out in front of the others, and having to keep that situation ongoing - she therefore has to keep the teasing/needling ongoing? Both make sense of the evidence, but neither are good. Hence, I already want to slap her. The word is B*tch. AND Cow.

Try saying to her (using a formal, olde-worlde gentlemanly manner): "Madam, it is just TOOOOOO arrogant of you to PRRRE-SUUUUME that I would automatically FANCY your feet. I might find them distinctly off-putting for all one knows? Perhaps that doth explain hhhwhy 'the Lady doth protesteth too much'?" That should shut 'er up. If not - go simpler and say: I don't WANT to see your feet, thank-you-very-much! Don't NEED to....I can smell 'em from HERE! That definitely will. Or it'll get her having to prove to the room that she has neither ugly nor cheesy feet. If she DOES whip off the socks - no matter if they're pretty feet, just say....'Naaah...not my type'. :)

Another option is to point out (so that everyone can hear) that she has a fetish that is faaar-far deeper than yours. And when she asks, What, you reply - Your obsession with my obsession. (It's true, isn't it? Hahahaha - *owned*.) PS: if this is because she secretly fancies you thus resents you for 'being too weird' to date ("damn you!"), then, she should stick to boys her own age (6) and over-painfully pull THEIR pigtails instead.

Change it - suddenly HAVE a fettish FOR somethin else > you LIKE it when ... she/people in general wear < a hat / insert object>

I think he's long-gone, but, that's a shame because - HAHAHAHAHA - YEAH! I LIKE THAT! Nice one, Missguided! (So you're a Bugs-Bunny kind of Counter-Manipulator, eh? Someone's had to deal with a lot of Narcs, then?)