Have I lost her for good?

Not sure if this was the right place to post- I recently got dumped by my ex-GF we were together for almost 4 years. the break up wasn't terrible bad but not good either- I was unhappy with my current job situation and that stress led to stress with our relationship which led me to to ask her a lot if she was cheating by what i perceived as shady actions so on (all in my mind I believe). I also sensed her pulling away slowly but surely about 4 months before the end. and i panicked which drove into further accusations from me and more arguments. then the break up, she sent me on my way. i believed i deserved it. I never thought she would have outed me but she did. --- After the break up she still talked to me via phone and text and messenger. I made the cardinal mistake as most guys do , begging pleading, what not all of that , 1000 text messages, messenger so on calls all that. (basically all the unattractive straight turn off type stuff on the list. she tells me that if i don't stop she will change her number and of course i stopped calling and only send her text messages of love and how much i could make things right. she tells me again to stop or she will change her number. I asked if it was another man and she said not another man that it was all the stressful verbal abuse. I asked her if there is any chance of us together again and she doesn't answer that question, she just states stop blowing up my phone. so i have stopped all together. I know with everything in my heart this is the women for me. I love this women more than i can imagine. she has not changed her number and after all the loving text i sent she only said stop blowing up my phone basically. I stopped.------I guess my question is. she hasn't changed her number and I know she loves me, she has told be even after the break up. she even told me she didn't want to see all the loving comments via text, is that because its pulling at her heart or she is just done with me? She also messaged me again after that just to tell me again if i don't stop she would change her number. but she doesn't change her number i know i pushed her to a extreme anger state over my stupidity. so is all lost? or is there a chance at all to get her back in the future? its been a few days now and no contact. I'm drastically afraid that if i don't at least text her one small text a day or every two days she will just forget about me kinda like outta site outta mind. I've heard mixed responses on the no contact rule so i am just not sure. thanks for any insight and thanks for reading.

well 3 days later and no contact. I've broken down in tears everyday. I've prayed to god for any guidance, I've literally had nothing to eat, I'm weak, alone, and I feel as though i really can't go on. I've lost 32 pounds in around 2 weeks. I'm too old to get another chance at true love. I've been around the relationship block a few times in my life and I've never once had the love for anyone that I have for her. I know with all my heart and soul this was the woman for me. I broke down yesterday and sent one message that said goodbye and i got no response at all. She was my light and my inspiration, my foundation and my soul and it's my fault we split. I let the stresses of regular life interfere and blind me from seeing my angel, my queen, my love. I had her to come home to each day and I ruined it. If only i could turn the clock back, but i can't. I prayed and wish i had another chance to fill her heart with love and treat as the angel she is in my eyes. If only I could hold her one more time, kiss her soft lips and smell her beautiful hair. If only i could see her beautiful smile one last time. but that is all gone now. I say to all of you who post here with problems in your relationships to really get in touch with yourselves and think twice about abandoning your spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend. Think long an hard if your the one causing the issue and make that change, please make that change for the better of you both. The devastation to the other is sometimes to much for one to handle. Think honestly inside and do all you can to communicate before making decisions you regret. for you only find TRUE love once in your life, please everyone don't let it slip away as i have. Thank you dearly for Letting me post here. I will take my life before day breaks. and i only pray that god send all my love to her my one and only. She may not want me anymore but my love is unconditional for her and her alone. Thank You

Please don't do anything stupid dude... give life a chance.. talk to me... I can try to help you..out... I have passed through situation similar to u contact me @ [e-mail address removed] your life is important