I'm not sure he's mature enough

Hello everyone, I'm a 20 years-old girl dating a 25 years-old guy since about three months. Though, we've been flirting a lot at friends' party about five or six months before we started dating. He's not much of a talker so I didn't really know him when I started dating him, but I was attracted and I spend a lot of good times with him so I went for it. My problem is this : he's not going to school, he just found a part-time job he hates (but won't try to find another one 'cause... I don't know he never answers the question clearly), he's not sure he wants to go back to school or anything, he still lives at his parents' house. Personnally I'm in university, I'm living by myself since a year and a half, I've move out of my parents' town... I am a girl with a lot of drive, I am passionate, I traveled a lot, I live by the rule of "I you want it, you'll have it". I work very hard to get the things that mean to me, such a the travels I had, my good grades, the scholarship I've won, etc. I feel like I'm making my boyfriend progress mentally and emotionally while I'm just there, waiting. He has realized a lot of things about life since he's with me, but I haven't progress, or grew up, or mature about anything since I'm with him. I feel like I'm showing him that there's a world of possibilities out of his room and his games... I'm not sure he's mature enough for me. I want to do lots of things, I have plans, dreams, I'm a girl full of energy and hopes. He's really calm and quiet and I never know if he likes anything or if he wants to do anything. He's very caring and everything, he takes really care of me - I'm his first girlfriend and he never stops to say that he loves me and that he wants us to be together for a long time. Though, I feel like he's unambitious and doesn't care that he's not going anywhere in life. I'm not looking for an overly ambitious guy, but I'd wish he had dreams or.. something that would makes him want to go further in life. So, yeah - I don't know if I should give him some time to be who he wants to be, if I'm actually trying to change/mature a man who doesn't really want to be change/maturing or... I'm lost. Thanks (sorry for the mistakes, English isn't my first language !)

Hi lady, Do you think the value of the relationship outweighs the ways you have made sacrifices? I know you've done a lot to try and help encourage him, and you feel like he really cares for you. But do you feel like he's holding you back? If you think having him as a boyfriend in your life is taking more out of you than it is enriching your life, maybe you want to consider breaking it off for good.

Thanks Sissie, I actually feel like he's holding me back... I have just moved in a new city - I'm from a small town of the countryside, and I didn't like the university there so I've decide to move in the big city. My boyfriend still lives in the countryside, at about three hours from me. He doesn't want to use his car to come to sees me, and since I don't own one, we only see eachother twice or once a month. I feel like he's holding me back 'cause there's a lot of activities here, and I can't always do what I want because I have to try to go back to the countryside to see him. I've been wanting for a long time to quit the countryside and I feel kinda "trapped" sometimes because, to see him, I have to go back to the place I wanted so bad to get away from. My dilemma is that... right now I feel like he's holding me back and I'm giving him more then he's giving me. He is lovely, caring, he likes to buy me things and he's really, really dependant and cute - he's giving me a lot of love and attention. But what I truly seeks is someone with who I can make plans, have deep conversations... I'm a really intellectual girl and he's not much of a talker. Should I wait until he gets his act together, or ends things right now since I'm not being enriched by the relationship and breaks his heart ?

That is tough to say. People change, this is true. But do they always? Not really. I've dealt with trying to change people too much in my past before. You could always approach him and tell him how you're feeling about things - say that you've got a lot of goals and things ahead of you and you aren't sure they will match up with his. If he shows a spark, a willingness to step things up and start traveling to see you (or at least help some other way so you can meet up) then there might be a chance for it. I hope this helps! Ultimately, you have to do what your heart says.